Undergraduate / Robotics club and mentorship - Tell us about who you are. UBC [3]

This is a personal profile short essay for UBC. Please could you give me some feedback? Thanks.

Tell us about who you are.

How would your family, friends, and/or members of your community describe you?
If possible, please include something about yourself that you are most proud of and why.
(maximum 1500 characters)

From a close friend, older brother and an ambitious leader, to a learner and dedicated worker, people note me as someone who can adapt to any situation. Being student council president (8,11,12) at (name of school), head of the robotics club, and a STEM mentor for youth gives me the chances for being someone who can take initiative and inspire others to learn more. I strive to refine every weakness I exhibit by taking the initiative to seek discomfort and meliorate(correct word?) my flaws. Commitment, being one of my defining qualities, is shown through my dedication and diligence of playing Soccer, the guitar, and volunteering in non-profit organizations for over six years.

I tend to take leadership opportunities head on using my spirited(?) voice to steer people in the right direction. This demands strong attention to detail which also helps me deal with young stem prospects that I teach. Although I was not born a leader, I have grown out of my once restricted shell to reach into a variety of communities that would usually not be in my interest. This taught me the importance of leadership, either by listening to others or through working collectively for a common goal.

What am I most proud of?? (missing)(what else should i include/add)

There are also some things in brackets like little notes idk about