Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by Haiha0205
Name: Nguyễn Hải Hà
Joined: May 29, 2024
Last Post: Sep 23, 2024
Threads: 1
Posts: 4  
From: Viet Nam
School: Quang Trung high school for gifted student

Displayed posts: 5
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Haiha0205   
Sep 23, 2024
Undergraduate / Perfectly Imperfect - personal statement | International Relations [4]

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Personal Essay / International Relations / PERFECTLY IMPERFECT



Personal Essay
Share an essay on any topic of your choice. It can be one you've already written, one that responds to a different prompt, or one of your own design.

PERFECTLY IMPERFECT

Constantly worrying about others' opinions casts a shadow on my mood. I had a tiring day filled with thoughts, but it doesn't seem as bad as I initially perceived it through others' perspectives.

A night like any other, these thoughts often distract me from studying and leave me feeling overwhelmed. Sometimes, I dwelled on past interactions and comments regardless of wasting valuable time. Thinking about meaningless things makes it difficult for me to concentrate on my tasks, and sometimes I find myself crying over imagined scenarios that never took place.

How did this mess begin again?

As a child, I was a determined girl striving to meet others' expectations. In Vietnam, the term "next-door kid" has become a societal standard. This term refers to the numerous impressive academic achievements attained by the "next-door child," which create a benchmark against which are often compared. For reasons not entirely understood, these expectations remain ingrained in the minds of parents and students when evaluating individual success.

As I grew up, I constantly sought to be the best version of myself out of fear of being judged. I often questioned whether achieving this ideal would truly bring me happiness. Neither my family nor my friends could provide a definitive answer. Eventually, I discovered my own answer, but I became overly sensitive to negative comments about myself, leading me to believe that I was not good enough.

Failing to meet others' expectations drove me to seek validation from family and friends. This mindset persisted until I didn't gain admission to my dream class. It was only when my teacher-who had supported me for seven years-said, "You don't need to worry about disappointing or being laughed at by others. You just need to be the best version of yourself. You've put in your best effort using your skills and intelligence, without relying on luck like others." She continued, "Failing to achieve something you desire may mean that better opportunities are on the way. A new environment can shield you from toxic influences you may not have noticed before. Success may await you there." It was then that I realized how these societal standards dehumanized and objectified not only myself but also other teenagers.

I realized that it didn't matter who I was; I was not good enough by those standards, and my abilities were not as remarkable as others. However, looking up, I found that I was no one's equal; looking down, no one was my equal either. I wanted to help everyone who felt they did not fit the mold reclaim their core values.

I came to understand that a person's worth is not determined by their achievements. I joined the Quang Trung Media Club at my high school and quickly advanced to become a leader of the MC team. Transitioning from a member to a leader gave me a deep understanding of the pressures people face. I believe that a club provides an environment where individuals can showcase their abilities and learn from each other. Despite occasional anxiety before hosting a program, I have always maintained the belief that everyone can improve in their own way.

The impact I have made, and continue to make, may not be enough to heal the wounds inflicted by oppressive standards. Yet, I am dedicated to sharing my experiences to inspire change in others' mindsets and to eliminate toxicity. Though transformation is gradual, I am committed to making gradual changes that will resonate with others and ultimately change the persistent yet harmful standards of perfection.
Haiha0205   
Sep 23, 2024
Writing Feedback / The graph below shows the amount of money spent on books in Germany, France, Italy and Austria [4]

your writing task 1 is really good at some points however there are some sentences with poor formation in your essay and i am willing to suggest some improvements. Firstly, from my point of view, the phrase "throughout the timescales given" is awkward and unclear so using a simpler and more precise phrase would improve clarity. Secondly, you should make sure comparisons are clear and logical, especially when discussing trends over time. that's it thanks for reading my feedback, i wish you can make a improvement
Haiha0205   
Sep 23, 2024
Writing Feedback / Proportions of workers in three different fields in South Korea - TASK 1 [3]

i think this essay has a basic structure, starting with an overview and moving into more specific details about each field. However, there are some mistakes that you had better rephrase for better flow like "the proportions of workers rose gradually, growing from nearly 30 percent to 35 percent, reaching a peak of 35 percent in 1991" could be more clearly stated. The repetition of "35 percent" is awkward and should be rephrased.
Haiha0205   
Sep 17, 2024
Undergraduate / Perfectly Imperfect - personal statement | International Relations [4]

Caring too much about others' opinions always worsens my mood. I had a tiring day filled with thoughts but actually it doesn't seem as bad as I thought from others' perspectives.

A night like any other, I was distracted from studying and feeling down. Sometimes, I dwelled on past interactions and comments regardless of wasting valuable time. Thinking about meaningless things makes it difficult for me to concentrate on my tasks, and sometimes I find myself crying over imaginary scenes that have never happened.

How did this mess begin again?

As a child, I was a determined girl striving to meet others' expectations. In Vietnam, the concept of the "next-door kid" has become a societal standard. Referring to that term. There are numerous impressive academic achievements attained by the "next-door child" one after another. For reasons not entirely understood, these relics persist steadfastly in the collective consciousness of humanity, including parents, students, and others, particularly when compared to other individuals.

As I grew up, I constantly strived to be the best version of myself out of fear of being judged. I often questioned whether achieving this ideal would truly bring me happiness from an external perspective. Neither my family, nor my friends, nor I could find a definitive answer to this. Eventually, I found my own answer, but I became overly sensitive to negative comments about myself, leading me to believe that I was not good enough.

Failure to live up to others' expectations led me to seek validation from other parts of myself such as family, friends, etc. That mindset persisted until I failed to apply for the class I had been dreaming of. It was only when my teacher, who had been supporting me for seven years, told me, "You don't need to worry about disappointing or being laughed at by others. You just need to be the best version of yourself. You've put in your best effort using your skills and intelligence without relying on luck like others". "Failing to achieve something you desire may mean that better opportunities are on the way. A new environment can shield you from toxic influences that you may not have noticed before. Success may await you in this new environment. It was then that I realized how these societal standards dehumanized and objectified not only myself but also other teenagers.

Yet I realized it was no matter who I was. I was not good enough, my ability was not as wonderful as others, but looking up, I was no one's equal, looking down, no one was my equal either. And I wanted to help everyone who felt that they did not fit the mold to reclaim their core values.

I came to realize that a person's value is not determined by their achievements. I joined the Quang Trung Media Club at my high school and quickly advanced to become a leader of the MC team. Transitioning from a member to a leader, I gained a deep understanding of the pressures people face. However, I believe that a club provides an environment where people can showcase their abilities and learn from each other. Despite the occasional anxiety before hosting a program, I always maintained the belief that everyone can improve in their own way.

The impacts I was and am doing may not be enough to retract the wounds inflicted by oppressive standards. Yet, I wanted to devote my experiences to everyone, which can bring about a change in one's mind, and thus completely eliminate all toxic things. That will not be effective as soon as possible. Little by little, we can reach more people and eventually change the persistent yet harmful perfection standards.
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