Writing Feedback / What determines success in life? - opinion essay [3]

Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Success is one of the key destinations for most people. While many individuals suppose that success is achieved through working hard and having determination, others argue that other aspects such as money and appearance are more concerning. From my perspective, although I acknowledge that there are a lot of ways that have contributed to success, I hold the view that hard work and determination are more substantial to achieve the goals.
Some people believe that there are several factors such as wealth and attractive looks that can greatly lead to individuals' success. Indeed, individuals with financial resources may have greater access to opportunities and resources that facilitate success. Moreover, these days, social perceptions and biases have a tendency to base on factors such as appearance can impact an individual's possibility to achieve their goals, as attractiveness and presentation often play a vital role in how people are perceived and treated in various settings. However, there are some cases that people gaining temporary success thanks to affluence and outward beauty without attemption and persistence in their path might be prone to face some flaws and temptation. This can indicate that this is an unsustainable success that may be lost anytime.

On the other hand, it is apparent that success that comes from hard work and determination is more remaining and long-lasting. Firstly, they are essential factors in achieving success as they enable individuals to develop important skills such as perseverance, resilience, and discipline. Particularly, Jack Ma, who is the founder of Alibaba, was rejected a lot of times when applying for jobs; however, thanks to his relentless effort, he has pursued the business, and he turned Alibaba into one of the largest e-commerce companies in the world. Secondly, the journey of working hard towards one's goals often leads to personal growth and fulfillment because individuals might overcome challenges and obstacles to reach their desired outcomes. As a result, they are bound not to be defeated easily by new hardship.

In conclusion, while elements such as wealth and appearance can play significant roles in influencing opportunities and societal perceptions, hard work and determination are fundamental components of success. However, it is important to recognize that true success is multifaceted and subjective, and individuals should thrive to define success based on their own values, goals, and aspirations rather than external factors.