Undergraduate / Prompt 2- "to honor the life of a departed friend" [9]

Prompt #2 (Edit mine, I'll edit yours)

Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are? *

The sorrow left rapidly. The scars that remained, however, will never heal. I can still remember the connection we had the first time we met. I can also still remember my trembling as I gave a eulogy at his funeral. Every detail of the hearse and funeral procession still remain vivid in my mind. My best friend, Ryan Hwang, passed away too soon. Images that gave me nightmares continue to haunt me. I unwillingly replay the car crash in my mind; and I stubbornly continue to punish myself for my uselessness and patheticness during the accident.

Death is common, but I never expected it to affect a high school student as myself. The stages of grief I learned about so tediously in health class became a reality. First came the denial and rejection. My refusal to believe the truth served as my only tool to escape the pain. Cowardly, I hid from the facts and argued with tangible evidence. But I knew the trauma had to stop eventually. When the shock had worn off, the guilt struck. Why couldn't I save him? Why couldn't I have done something in that situation? Depression followed promptly after the incident. My grades dropped, and my social life was compromised; emptiness could never weigh so much. His death acted as a catalyst for my motivation - after the depression came the opportunity and the drive to make the world a better place; an attempt to remove the sadness that previously overwhelmed me. Not all students have the misfortune to lose someone they love that early, and I feel as if that significantly altered the course of my life.

My character has been built on my experiences, and the death of my friend registered as a significant event in the sequence of my life. Mental strength and the ability to persevere became core qualities in my personality. I have noticed a major change in the way I more pensively analyze details, and in the way I appreciate my friends. If there was anything to be gained from this terrible tragedy, it would be the profound lesson that nothing can be taken for granted. I realized that there is no longer any room for hate; there wasn't enough love as it was.

Fortunately, being able to honor the life of a departed friend enabled me to transcend the wrenching pain, and rediscover the joy in living. I see the future in a new spectrum; one that is brighter, and more colorful than the previous. My impetus has been rekindled. It seems as if my thirst for new knowledge and information can never be quenched, and I strive to improve myself in any aspect achievable.

Thanks for any feedback. I'll review your essay if you review mine.