zebraessay
Mar 12, 2010
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing: opinions on children's part-time job [5]
Thanks for your help,Kevin~
Thanks for your help,Kevin~
zebraessay
Mar 11, 2010
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing: opinions on children's part-time job [5]
^^~ Thank you so much Enda T. I am so grateful.
^^~ Thank you so much Enda T. I am so grateful.
zebraessay
Mar 10, 2010
Writing Feedback / IELTS Writing: opinions on children's part-time job [5]
In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.
What are your opinions on this?
These days, there has been much controversy as to whether children should take a part-time job or not. Some firmly believe that it is too early to get a job during the childhood, whereas others hold a viewpoint that it would be beneficial to them in terms of developing further ability of learning and taking responsibility. However, I have a firm belief that it is good for children to understand some aspects of life, but they should pay attention to avoid acquiring some inappropriate habits from workplace.
It is evident that children will grow up; eventually they have to deal with their works in adulthood. Therefore, the more they understand some aspects of life the better. For instance, being punctual and insisting on the performance of work, and so on. Moreover, these aspects such attitudes are not only beneficial to work, but also to study. Obviously, it is significantly important for a student to hold a view on insisting work hard and attend class regularly.
On the other hand, there are some debates regarding how to protect children from bad habits or risky behabiours. Thus, I suggest that parents should cautiously judge what kinds of work are suitable for their next younger generation and closely monitor their social relations. For example, children should not be allowed to undertake those jobs that are beyond their capacities, like lifting too heavy goods. In addition, children should stay away from some friends who are smoking for their health.
By way of conclusion, I once again reaffirm my position that it is acceptable for children to have a part time job in order to cultivate positive attitudes and useful skills for present learning and further jobs but parents should take care of children and protect them from dangerous tasks and unhealthy behaviours.
300 words
*Please give me some suggestions, many thanks!
In many countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.
What are your opinions on this?
These days, there has been much controversy as to whether children should take a part-time job or not. Some firmly believe that it is too early to get a job during the childhood, whereas others hold a viewpoint that it would be beneficial to them in terms of developing further ability of learning and taking responsibility. However, I have a firm belief that it is good for children to understand some aspects of life, but they should pay attention to avoid acquiring some inappropriate habits from workplace.
It is evident that children will grow up; eventually they have to deal with their works in adulthood. Therefore, the more they understand some aspects of life the better. For instance, being punctual and insisting on the performance of work, and so on. Moreover, these aspects such attitudes are not only beneficial to work, but also to study. Obviously, it is significantly important for a student to hold a view on insisting work hard and attend class regularly.
On the other hand, there are some debates regarding how to protect children from bad habits or risky behabiours. Thus, I suggest that parents should cautiously judge what kinds of work are suitable for their next younger generation and closely monitor their social relations. For example, children should not be allowed to undertake those jobs that are beyond their capacities, like lifting too heavy goods. In addition, children should stay away from some friends who are smoking for their health.
By way of conclusion, I once again reaffirm my position that it is acceptable for children to have a part time job in order to cultivate positive attitudes and useful skills for present learning and further jobs but parents should take care of children and protect them from dangerous tasks and unhealthy behaviours.
300 words
*Please give me some suggestions, many thanks!