abhisheksahai
May 9, 2010
Writing Feedback / Sex Education In Schools and Colleges Is A Must. [2]
people please help me out in assessing it and do tell me how could i have improved?as it is for the first time that i am writing for a competitive exam
the topic is as follows and the minimum number of words to be used is 250
Sex Education In Schools and Colleges Is A Must...
The latest surveys tell us that the majority of patients, in INDIA (about 87.94%) who are suffering from AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, do not even know about how did they get the disease or even what the disease is. It indeed is the pathetic plight of these patients which urges one and all to spread the awareness about the same.
A very simple and uncomplicated way to spread awareness is by means of making " SEX EDUCATION" a must in all schools , colleges and similar institutes imparting knowledge to the youth.
If sex education is made compulsory, the figures showing the number of patients suffering from these STD's (sexually transmitted diseases) are bound to drastically fall down in the near future. This is the only way that I feel, will the youth learn about SEX as knowledge rather than by experimenting.
I agree that initially there will be lots of situations which might be embarrassing to the female teachers and the female students as well. But there is a solution for that as well. Firstly, there should be separate teachers for the subject. Secondly, the male teachers should teach the boy students and female teachers should teach girl students.
This law of making Sex Education is unlikely to have any negative effects of high magnitude, besides the fact, that a few mischievous students, might start having fantasies in their young minds, who otherwise also would have got to know about SEX from other unreliable sources.
In conclusion, I would like to state that SEX EDUCATION has more advantages than disadvantages and therefore, it should be made compulsory in all schools and colleges.
people please help me out in assessing it and do tell me how could i have improved?as it is for the first time that i am writing for a competitive exam
the topic is as follows and the minimum number of words to be used is 250
Sex Education In Schools and Colleges Is A Must...
The latest surveys tell us that the majority of patients, in INDIA (about 87.94%) who are suffering from AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases, do not even know about how did they get the disease or even what the disease is. It indeed is the pathetic plight of these patients which urges one and all to spread the awareness about the same.
A very simple and uncomplicated way to spread awareness is by means of making " SEX EDUCATION" a must in all schools , colleges and similar institutes imparting knowledge to the youth.
If sex education is made compulsory, the figures showing the number of patients suffering from these STD's (sexually transmitted diseases) are bound to drastically fall down in the near future. This is the only way that I feel, will the youth learn about SEX as knowledge rather than by experimenting.
I agree that initially there will be lots of situations which might be embarrassing to the female teachers and the female students as well. But there is a solution for that as well. Firstly, there should be separate teachers for the subject. Secondly, the male teachers should teach the boy students and female teachers should teach girl students.
This law of making Sex Education is unlikely to have any negative effects of high magnitude, besides the fact, that a few mischievous students, might start having fantasies in their young minds, who otherwise also would have got to know about SEX from other unreliable sources.
In conclusion, I would like to state that SEX EDUCATION has more advantages than disadvantages and therefore, it should be made compulsory in all schools and colleges.