Posts by jwbusername

jwbusername

Sep 1, 2010

Undergraduate / "volunteering in a prominent local hospital," 150 WORDS COMMON APP ESSAY [12]

Hey everyone, thanks for the great advice! I really appreciate it! Here's the revised version with the suggested changes:

How's this?

PS: I left the "for the past two years" in the beginning, because I figured that it might be good to start off by emphasizing commitment and giving a "time frame" for them to keep in mind while reading the rest of the essay.

jwbusername

Aug 30, 2010

Undergraduate / "volunteering in a prominent local hospital," 150 WORDS COMMON APP ESSAY [12]

Thanks for the suggestions! The prompt was to briefly elaborate on one of our extracurricular activities or work experiences in 150 words or less. It's because the common application gives like 1 line of room for each activity...which is not enough to get a good picture of it. So i don't really think this counts as an "essay". I already had to write 2 other essays, and one of them I got more creative and personal.

And because of the 150 word limit (which is not that much), I wanted to really elaborate on what I did at the hospital.

But I will definitely try to work in more personal stuff. Thanks!

jwbusername

Aug 30, 2010

Undergraduate / "volunteering in a prominent local hospital," 150 WORDS COMMON APP ESSAY [12]

This is my short answer for the 150 words or less section on the common app, elaborating on an extracurricular activity. Any comments/edits/suggestions are welcome. Thanks in advance!

For the past two years, I've had the opportunity to volunteer at Hôtel-Dieu Grace Hospital, a prominent local hospital, where I devoted myself to serving those in the healthcare community. In 10th grade, I worked at the coffee bar, where I handled significant amounts of money and prepared refreshments, and this summer I switched to working on the discharge team. Here, our responsibility was to take wheelchair patients from around the hospital to other departments, or to meet their families and friends outside. On the discharge team, I was called to almost every one of the nine floors in the building; this enabled me to experience the diverse aspects of the hospital community. During my time here, I gained a great deal of valuable insight into the health profession by developing relationships with doctors, nurses, and patients. More importantly, this experience has given me a heart for the sick and elderly, and a stronger sense of responsibility.