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Posts by andykaufman
Joined: Sep 23, 2010
Last Post: Sep 23, 2010
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 3
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andykaufman   
Sep 23, 2010
Undergraduate / FSU prompt, focused on Artes aspect (Beauty of Intellectual Pursuits) [6]

Knowledge Hunt FSU App. I need a review of my final draft.

The beauty of intellectual pursuits is something that I greatly value. Although there is no true end to the hunt, there are many satisfying victories along the way.

One of the reasons, I find knowledge so fascinating is because of its ability to open up new doors for people. My parents never went to college; they never had the opportunity or the time. Regardless, they encouraged me to attain an education, to expand my horizons, and to diversify my knowledge across many fields. One of the most significant things I have realized is that learning is not confined within the classroom. I have learned about different cultures by experiencing them firsthand. I have seen what it truly means to be a citizen, actively participating in my community.

The art of chasing knowledge is one of the main influences that has drawn me to the field of psychology. I find the human mind to be an amazing tool, capable of limitless possibilities. Yet, there are so many secrets behind it. The human brain is responsible for creating great things such as vaccines and seedless watermelons, but is equally responsible for things such as the atomic bomb or slavery. I hope one day I will be able to contribute something to the understanding of our brains and ourselves as a community.

Furthermore, learning has not only provided me with knowledge of my world but also of myself. Although it is important to learn about your surroundings, I also find it vital and rewarding when you take the time to gain knowledge in things you are personally interested in. For instance, I love music; and decided to learn to play guitar through my own lessons. Once I saved up enough money, I bought a guitar and started to learn the basics- strings, scales, chords, and the like. Though it was difficult, I continued to chase my musical dreams until I got better and better. Unfortunately, I am not the next Jimi Hendrix, but at least I can say I know how to play guitar.

Through my intellectual pursuits, I have uncovered an interest in the workings of the human brain, I have discovered what values and ideals are important to me, and I have concluded that I do not possess the necessary abilities in order to become a guitar god. Most importantly, I've realized that there's so much more to learn.
andykaufman   
Sep 23, 2010
Writing Feedback / A broad essay assignment called "Who Are We?" (antidepressant medication, depression) [3]

You don't need to make an argument for either side just yet. You can start by giving information about depression and the pharmaceuticals that are being used to treat it. Do some research. Inform readers. Then develop your personal opinions and back them up with valid points. It's an interesting topic. You can also tie it to a larger scale. Thousands of people are diagnosed with the wrong mental illnesses because there are no concrete symptoms in psychology. How do we define ourselves? Do we rely too heavily on these "definitions", and therefore become them? Just food for thought. I hope I helped. Good luck!
andykaufman   
Sep 23, 2010
Undergraduate / "my assets fit the philosphy" - Vires, Artes, Mores [3]

I'm applying to FSU also. I'm no expert or anything but this is a fairly well-written standard college essay. I like the mention of the Legos, but you may want to add on another sentence to really link it back to the "Artes" philosophy. Overall, it's nice, and ties in a lot of different aspects about you. Good luck!
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