pdowling
Oct 19, 2010
Undergraduate / "willingness to help others" - I'm very happy with most aspects of my personality [3]
From the MIT application:
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (*) (200-250 words)
"I'm very happy with most aspects of my personality, but the one that I value the most and which I am sincerely proud of is my willingness to help others. I have the attitude that if I am able to help someone who needs it, I cannot justify not doing so.
This shows itself in many different ways. I was a tutor for math and physics in school, and would often discuss and give feedback on other's work. Even though this has made me sort of a "go-to" person for any kind of help, I'm happy to do it because it helps me as much as the person I'm helping. At a local school for disabled children, many parents of children with communicative disabilities were unable to afford certain speech generating devices for their kids. Looking at the devices, I knew that they had very simple soft- and hardware, and were clearly over-priced. It wouldn't be hard to write software that converts any desktop or tablet PC into a "Talker". I felt compelled to help them, and my father and I developed such a program, which is now being used in the whole school, free of charge.
This attitude is also a large part of why I want to attend MIT. I feel that with the opportunities MIT can provide me with, I will be able to truly have an impact on the world, and to make other people's lives better."
I'm struggling a bit with the 250 word limit, could any of you see something in this that I could omit or rephrase without taking away from the essay?
Of course any other advice and criticism is also welcome!
From the MIT application:
What attribute of your personality are you most proud of, and how has it impacted your life so far? This could be your creativity, effective leadership, sense of humor, integrity, or anything else you'd like to tell us about. (*) (200-250 words)
"I'm very happy with most aspects of my personality, but the one that I value the most and which I am sincerely proud of is my willingness to help others. I have the attitude that if I am able to help someone who needs it, I cannot justify not doing so.
This shows itself in many different ways. I was a tutor for math and physics in school, and would often discuss and give feedback on other's work. Even though this has made me sort of a "go-to" person for any kind of help, I'm happy to do it because it helps me as much as the person I'm helping. At a local school for disabled children, many parents of children with communicative disabilities were unable to afford certain speech generating devices for their kids. Looking at the devices, I knew that they had very simple soft- and hardware, and were clearly over-priced. It wouldn't be hard to write software that converts any desktop or tablet PC into a "Talker". I felt compelled to help them, and my father and I developed such a program, which is now being used in the whole school, free of charge.
This attitude is also a large part of why I want to attend MIT. I feel that with the opportunities MIT can provide me with, I will be able to truly have an impact on the world, and to make other people's lives better."
I'm struggling a bit with the 250 word limit, could any of you see something in this that I could omit or rephrase without taking away from the essay?
Of course any other advice and criticism is also welcome!