Jazzyrich1
Oct 29, 2010
Undergraduate / "Leaves to spread the seeds" - Common App Essay [4]
this is good.. it shows growth for you as an individual. i really like the imagery that you show by comparing yourself to the tree leaves.
also, do not use contractions because it is not formal
My father's mother is an immigrant from the Philippines and she has taught meof her culture and ultimately has instilled in me the tolerance on of people different from myself in looks and in actions.
My family has always been around to support me and have provided me with all I'veneeded to develop a strong moral conscious of tolerance, love, honesty, and generosity, but, just as the leaves, I cannot rely on them for everything.
Over the past few months, I have witnessed the changing color of the leaves. In spring, they bud into similar bright green leaves, but in autumn, each leaf changes colors into a distinct shade and pattern. Since entering high school, I feel as though I am one of these changing leaves. As I grow older, I realize that, though I can always count on my family and friends to help me, I must begin to become independent.The leaves are eachEach leaf is taking on theirits own individual color just as I have begun to develop my own personality. Though I will always keep the values provided to me by my family, I will also be independent. InFor the past three years of high school, I have made new friends and learned many new things, but most importantly, I have developed into an individual. I have participated in soccer, football, and track, each of which has allowed me to develop toughness and perseverance. I have become a member of National Honor Society which has further ingrained in me the virtue of generosity.
As I approach graduation, I know I will be released into the adult world. Just as the leaves must leave their comfort zone and cut themselves off from the nutrients of the tree, I, too, must enter into my future on my own. The leaves are thrown into chaos by the wind as they fall, and I know that I will face obstacles that will create chaos in my life. I look forward to finding my future through furthering my education and further developing my personality. The leaves must fall from the tree in order to spread the seeds of the tree, just as I will have to venture out from my family to spread their influence on me to others. All nature must grow, and as Abraham Lincoln once said, "You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was." Everyone, myself included, must grow and become an individual, which I look forward to continuing during the next phase of my life.
this is good.. it shows growth for you as an individual. i really like the imagery that you show by comparing yourself to the tree leaves.
also, do not use contractions because it is not formal
My father's mother is an immigrant from the Philippines and she has taught me
My family has always been around to support me and have provided me with all I'veneeded to develop a strong moral conscious of tolerance, love, honesty, and generosity, but, just as the leaves, I cannot rely on them for everything.
Over the past few months, I have witnessed the changing color of the leaves. In spring, they bud into similar bright green leaves, but in autumn, each leaf changes colors into a distinct shade and pattern. Since entering high school, I feel as though I am one of these changing leaves. As I grow older, I realize that, though I can always count on my family and friends to help me, I must begin to become independent.
As I approach graduation, I know I will be released into the adult world. Just as the leaves must leave their comfort zone and cut themselves off from the nutrients of the tree, I, too, must enter into my future on my own. The leaves are thrown into chaos by the wind as they fall, and I know that I will face obstacles that will create chaos in my life. I look forward to finding my future through furthering my education and further developing my personality. The leaves must fall from the tree in order to spread the seeds of the tree, just as I will have to venture out from my family to spread their influence on me to others. All nature must grow, and as Abraham Lincoln once said, "You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was." Everyone, myself included, must grow and become an individual, which I look forward to continuing during the next phase of my life.
