Undergraduate / "the first match I competed in" - personal quality, talent, experience [3]

Tell us about a personal quality, talent, accomplishment, contribution or experience that is important to you. What about this quality or accomplishment makes you proud, and how does it relate to the person you are?

It was my first wrestling match of my freshman year. My hands were sweating, knees trembling, and heart beating furiously. As I was sizing up the person standing directly in front of me, there were a million things racing through my frazzled mind, everything short of confidence, it was the fear of losing. Beyond the hard exterior facial facade I masked on to prove to my opponent that I was unafraid of him as I locked eyes with his, I was actually terrified. As I waited for the referee to blow the whistle to commence the match, extreme thoughts raced through my head. 'Will I pin him or will I be pinned? Is my opponent a stronger or weaker wrestler than I am?' But the instant the whistle blew, my anxieties subsided and my wrestling instincts quickly took over. The next thing I knew I was in for the biggest fight of my life.

It was a rigorous training to get into the fitness and shape that wrestling required. Our wrestling team had practice after school everyday of the week. It consisted of a variety of skills we all had to learn, including takedowns, pins, mental attitudes, strength development, etc. There was also a lot of drilling and plenty of live wrestling. The bare minimum of keeping up with our daily routine practices always left me exhausted. I almost believed that I couldn't do it. The countless times where I had to push myself to the extreme limits of my capabilities whether if it was finishing that last push up or pull up or taking that one last takedown short of my victory in a wrestling challenge when all of my limbs trembled uncontrollably, sweat that cascaded down my face, or my body screaming back under the exertion and stress, it really tested my physical and mental core capacities.

Besides the intense training I had to undergo in obtaining the best possible fitness, I was also training to change my mentality, the way I was thinking when it came to wrestling. Even when my body burned from exhaustion and fatigue and my mind urged me to quit, I never relented or gave up; I continued on. I was always striving to do more than what was required. There is a saying, "once you have wrestled, life is easy." My undying effort I put into wrestling has shown me the value of hard work and determination, that with both I could accomplish anything. In staying strong, it has positively shaped me into becoming the champion wrestler and person I was.

Even until today, I could still remember the first match I competed in. The outcome of the match resulted in my victory. But even if circumstances were different and I may have lost, I knew that I worked hard in getting where I was at and my determination never deterred for a second and that's all that mattered to me. The values that were instilled in me while being a part of the wrestling team, I hope, will continue on with me in my dreams of pursuing an education if I am accepted into your college.

Word count: 523

Any feedback or commentary is greatly appreciative! Thank you!

Undergraduate / "reclusive, family- orientated, Asian- based society" - Where i come from UC [3]

PROMPT I FRESHMEN APPLICANTS
Describe the world you come from - for example, your family, community, or school - and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.

A city with a population that doesn't exceed 30,000 located in ----. It is a city that lacks knowledge of the outside world and relies on its internet and school to educate the reality of the world. As the seasons churn and pass, here, it is always cool, warm, and sunny all year around. Relaxing and tranquil, the community is a very reclusive, family- orientated, Asian- based society. This is the world from which I come from that influences me and makes me who I am today.

Every man is for himself and to himself. As stereotype dictates, a majority of the Asian ethnicities that live in ---- are reclusive and independent. We strive for success with failure being not an option, even to the limits of death. As being an Asian myself, I live in a household with a strong parent guidance that pushes in the occupational fields of doctors and lawyers. On the contrary, there also exists compassion and consideration of what everyone feels and wants, including myself. As the human pathway is a forked road, every action has either a positive or negative reaction. In my case, I appreciate what my parents and older siblings, who are in college, shed in advice and guidance for me. Their understanding and compassion has helped me in choosing my aspirations and dreams. It has assisted me in choosing and pursuing a career in the medical field, because I have a strong urgency to return what was given to me that some others have not received, love.

From where I come from, I appreciate the life I was born into. From what I have learned and been taught, we all can influence the world from which the world we do come from. What I want to do, I hope, is make the world a better place.

Please offer an insight or advice on how I can improve this essay.
I have read quite a few essays for college apps on this forum and it inspired me to share mine's as well.
Criticisms are likewise accepted :)