Undergraduate / Peer pressure - just finished my first UC essay. Have some questions about topic. [5]

my first paragraph is an experience where i first meet my friends in high school and i dont give in to peer pressure. Is this a good topic to start the essay? I end it by saying: "Is this where my life was gravitating towards? Is this what I wanted to be?" I think the intro grabs the reader and isn't like most essays (about immigrating to the u.s. or about struggling with family issues).

Wondering if I could get some input on this, and im willing to send the essay to whoever is willing to edit it.