Undergraduate / MCPHS-Why I want to become a doctor...Women need my help over there [4]

Luck. Luck defines my life. My parents were able to escape Pakistan and succeed in creating a life for my brothers and I here in America. Because I have been so lucky, I want to give back to those who have not been as lucky. Pakistan has one of the worst medical fields in the world. On top of that, women are not allowed to be treated by male doctors due to religious reasons. Women are dying every day because they do not have access to a doctor. I want that to change. I want to devote my life to becoming a doctor and helping these women who are dying just because they do not have medical acssess. These women were not lucky enough to escape Pakistan, as my parents were. I could easily be in their positions. And because I am not, I find that I have to help these women who are living with diseases and illnesses that can be treated easily. MCPHS stands out to me in so many ways from other schools. When I first entered into the building, I noticed the huge pillars. I love the architecture, and the fact that it is located in the city. I also like the size of the school and the alumni from all different races. The fact that I am Pakistani is a problem for some people in my town, but at MCPHS I know I will be accepted and fit right in with other students from all walks of life. MCPHS is driven and rigorous schools for students who know what they want. I admire that MCPHS challenges and makes sure students know what they truly want.

Hi all...thank you for reading...if you could help me change it up or add anything that would be great!! Also I volunteer at the local hospital can i incorporate that in any way? This supplement has to be amazing!!! Thank you so much

Undergraduate / Brandeis - Raised by dinosaurs, Robots, or Aliens! [3]

Hi everyone, thank you for taking time to read my supplement for Brandeis University.

The question is: Would you rather be raised by dinosaurs, aliens or robots? Why?
I chose aliens.

I just need some editing on the supplement, and maybe some ideas too?

Thank you very much!!!

The clock hits 6:15 am, I jump out of my bed, conduct my daily morning routine, and yell, "Dad, it's time to go!!" I go through my regular school day and afterwards I engage in after school activities, come straight home, work on homework, eat with my relatives and family, and then go to bed. The idea of being raised my aliens is so appealing in this predictable life I have sometimes. I want to be able to wake up in the morning and instead of rushing off to school, I can do something else, whether it be invent something or conduct all kinds of experiments, or fly around in a huge, complex space shuttle! Aliens are the independent and have a complex mind of their own. They were not made by humans like robots, and they are not solely driven by instinct like dinosaurs. Aliens have also been able to advance themselves personally, unlike robots who are advanced by humans, and dinosaurs who died out. Aliens have been able to deal with all the trouble Earth has caused them. There are hundreds of people who are against aliens, and are doing everything to stop them, yet they continue to advance despite these troubles. And aliens live in space/galaxy! They are exposed to other parts of the universe that I could only dream of. They are able to deal with different gasses, planets, and maybe other life forms. Robots and dinosaurs were only on Earth, and they aren't able to experience these different things that occur in space.