Qi Enchou
Feb 22, 2011
Undergraduate / "an excellent education + help Africa" - Personal statement - Temple University [3]
Hello EssayForum, right here is my essay for Temple University. I actually wrote two essays and I am pretty much confused on which one to go with. I really need all the help you can give. Thank you!
Prompt:
Imagine you have graduated from Temple University. You are preparing to attend your 10-year reunion, and the alumni office has asked you to write a one-page essay about your personal and professional accomplishments since graduation.
Essay 1:
At the outset, I would like to thank the Management of Temple University to invite me to join the 10 year reunion.
With the deep sense of satisfaction and gratitude, I am writing a few words to express my sincere thanks to the Management and Faculties of Temple University for their contribution and guidance to develop my professional career and personal life.
As a university student, I have joined with a lot of apprehension and a few months later, I have had the confidence that I will be able to achieve the goal. It was my passion to major in civil engineering and I was blessed by choosing Temple University where I had the chance to mold my career and to work smart with the encouragement and guidance of well experienced professors.
I worked hard. Both working hard and working smart had possessed a major factor toward my success in life. I will bet my next month's salary that many have encouraged you to dream big. Maybe even to reach for the stars and aim high. I sure heard those about a million times right before I graduated from TU. So I did, I did dream big, I did aim high and I did reach for the stars and no doubt it works. In fact the saying itself is true: "if you aim for nothing, that's exactly what you'll hit: nothing." But there is something bigger than dreaming big.
You must have all been given a lecture at one time or another about the importance of having a vision. Even leadership experts say that an indispensable quality of a leader is to have a vision. Having a vision is, by far, the most important quality one can possess to succeed. My dad and I had a conversation about the topic and he convinced me that there is something even more important which is a 'Cause.' If all you do is try to reach your vision and you are pitted against someone fighting for a cause, chances are you'll lose. It may take time and it may take long, but if u have the right vision and your fighting for the right cause, you will prevail. If not, then you will ultimately fail.
The fact that I was given the opportunity to study in TU has definitely been given to me in terms of an excellent education.
This excellent education provided me a respectable position in my career and my achievements have attributed to a moral and awesome personal life.
Essay 2:
Ten years ago I was one of the most decorated and celebrated student in Temple University in the field of Academics and Sports but it was not too long when I decided to come back to my roots and my birthplace where I promise to myself that I must need to build my future to be greater for who and what I am now in Temple University and share the results to my family, friends and countrymen in China, one of the most fascinating places on earth.
I started my career with my father who owns one of the best Construction and Engineering Consulting Firm. With my presence I developed more divisions in the same field ( Earth Work Heavy Equipments Operations, Machineries and Producing Plants) and increases our client data base which presently we are handling the huge development on infrastructures of Acaba Port for big vessels and importations exportations operations on the country and neighboring places.
Presently I am studying my doctorate degree at Stanford University on the field of International Business Management. My family and works is my priorities which made me extend my years to be one of the most eligible bachelor.
We are planning to branch out our company to Africa who will be concentrating on infrastructures to help develop the oil refineries.
Thanks again!
Hello EssayForum, right here is my essay for Temple University. I actually wrote two essays and I am pretty much confused on which one to go with. I really need all the help you can give. Thank you!
Prompt:
Imagine you have graduated from Temple University. You are preparing to attend your 10-year reunion, and the alumni office has asked you to write a one-page essay about your personal and professional accomplishments since graduation.
Essay 1:
At the outset, I would like to thank the Management of Temple University to invite me to join the 10 year reunion.
With the deep sense of satisfaction and gratitude, I am writing a few words to express my sincere thanks to the Management and Faculties of Temple University for their contribution and guidance to develop my professional career and personal life.
As a university student, I have joined with a lot of apprehension and a few months later, I have had the confidence that I will be able to achieve the goal. It was my passion to major in civil engineering and I was blessed by choosing Temple University where I had the chance to mold my career and to work smart with the encouragement and guidance of well experienced professors.
I worked hard. Both working hard and working smart had possessed a major factor toward my success in life. I will bet my next month's salary that many have encouraged you to dream big. Maybe even to reach for the stars and aim high. I sure heard those about a million times right before I graduated from TU. So I did, I did dream big, I did aim high and I did reach for the stars and no doubt it works. In fact the saying itself is true: "if you aim for nothing, that's exactly what you'll hit: nothing." But there is something bigger than dreaming big.
You must have all been given a lecture at one time or another about the importance of having a vision. Even leadership experts say that an indispensable quality of a leader is to have a vision. Having a vision is, by far, the most important quality one can possess to succeed. My dad and I had a conversation about the topic and he convinced me that there is something even more important which is a 'Cause.' If all you do is try to reach your vision and you are pitted against someone fighting for a cause, chances are you'll lose. It may take time and it may take long, but if u have the right vision and your fighting for the right cause, you will prevail. If not, then you will ultimately fail.
The fact that I was given the opportunity to study in TU has definitely been given to me in terms of an excellent education.
This excellent education provided me a respectable position in my career and my achievements have attributed to a moral and awesome personal life.
Essay 2:
Ten years ago I was one of the most decorated and celebrated student in Temple University in the field of Academics and Sports but it was not too long when I decided to come back to my roots and my birthplace where I promise to myself that I must need to build my future to be greater for who and what I am now in Temple University and share the results to my family, friends and countrymen in China, one of the most fascinating places on earth.
I started my career with my father who owns one of the best Construction and Engineering Consulting Firm. With my presence I developed more divisions in the same field ( Earth Work Heavy Equipments Operations, Machineries and Producing Plants) and increases our client data base which presently we are handling the huge development on infrastructures of Acaba Port for big vessels and importations exportations operations on the country and neighboring places.
Presently I am studying my doctorate degree at Stanford University on the field of International Business Management. My family and works is my priorities which made me extend my years to be one of the most eligible bachelor.
We are planning to branch out our company to Africa who will be concentrating on infrastructures to help develop the oil refineries.
Thanks again!