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Posts by trenkins
Joined: Feb 27, 2011
Last Post: Mar 13, 2011
Threads: 1
Posts: 4  

From: Singapore

Displayed posts: 5
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trenkins   
Mar 3, 2011
Writing Feedback / Essay: The 'O' levels are redundant [4]

Can someone give me feedback on the essay?
Sorry, i have an argumentative essay test coming up next week, and i'm still very weak at it.
Your help is much appreciated:) THANKYOU!
trenkins   
Feb 28, 2011
Writing Feedback / young people's decision have no influence on the future of the nation [3]

Cheer up girl! What did you write about?

My stand on this is that young people's decisions definitely matters, as they are the future leaders of the country. Their current way of thinking and opinions, can say a lot about their character, attitude and moral values. All these affect their leadership, and should be taken seriously.

That is why so much time and effort is spent on educating the younger generation and inculcating the right moral values in them, shaping them into leaders of character. The young people in the country are going to be the working force, bringing the country's economy to greater heights, and their decisions and actions can cause the market in the world to plummet or prosper, in ten years' time.

In addition, with global warming becoming more and more serious, young people's take on the environment can cause a lot of consequences. If they were not to treat this worldwide problem seriously, our environment would continue to deteriorate at a shocking rate, and it would be the next few generation that suffers.

Not sure if this helps!
trenkins   
Feb 28, 2011
Writing Feedback / Essay: The 'O' levels are redundant [4]

Hi everyone! This is the first time i'm doing this, and hope that you all can help comment and improve on it! THANKYOU:)

16. The 'O' levels are redundant.

Many may think that the 'O' levels examinations are simply a waste of time and effort. The O-level examinations(Ordinary Level) is a subject-based qualification introduced as part of British educational reform in the 1950s, and is used in Singapore till today. It is not difficult to hear the complaints and groaning made by Secondary Four students nowadays because of the pressure they have to undertake, whether it is on CCAs, studies or relationship matters. So why must we add on to their burden by giving them a major examination in their teens? It is therefore my conviction that the 'O' levels are indeed redundant.

First and foremost, the 'O' levels examinations offers a limited proof of a student's overall academic ability in comparison with other methods such as coursework-based assessment spanning over a period of time. A student who study hard constantly for many years and another who only started listening in class in the year of the 'O' levels may jolly well get the same grades. Furthermore, the 'O' levels only has one paper for each subject, making it difficult to determine which students are the smarter ones, as the topic that came out may be the only topic that the student revised. This makes it unfair for the others who revised all the topics learnt. Thus, i strongly believe that the 'o' levels should be abolished.

Secondly, the 'O' levels examinations is a huge obstacle in a student's education. In the past, the 'O' levels are important, as students require the qualification to achieve their dream jobs in the society. However, few students stop their education after their 'O' levels, but instead proceed to higher levels of learning, whether it is in junior colleges, polytechnics or other institutions. Since most of the students intend to continue their learning after 'O' levels, why should we waste one year of their time revising for that examination, when they can be learning more chapters, and absorbing more experiences? Hence, the 'O' levels examinations should be taken away.

On the other hand, some may argue that the 'O' levels help students to recognize their strengths and weaknesses, allowing them to make a better career choice later on in their lives. However, isn't this what all examinations do? Students can follow their interests and achieve their dream jobs. In addition, students do not need to take such a major and stressful examination just to know their strengths and weaknesses, a simple school examination can carry out the same purpose. Therefore, the 'O' levels should not continue to be carried out in all secondary schools in singapore.

In conclusion, the 'O' levels are redundant, and should be abolished. The ministry of education can instead set more tests on a regular basis to test whether students understand the subject. This will also reduce the stress on each and every student, leading them to have a happier and more enjoyable childhood.

This is my first argumentative essay. I will really appreciate it if you can help me correct the mistakes and maybe help me improve on the rebuttle paragraph because i'm really weak in that. Thank you so much!:)

I am sitting for my 'O' levels this year, so this may be a bit contradictory.
trenkins   
Feb 28, 2011
Writing Feedback / Olevel: Internet/Computer harm or not? [8]

Well written! The arguments and rebuttals are all excellent!
Keep practicing(: Are you from 4/H? I'm from 4/C!
You can add a statement at the end of your first and second arguments, to link back to your stand, making your argument stronger, and tells the marker clearly that you believe strongly in this.

I like your conclusion.
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