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Posts by Biteshock
Joined: Apr 3, 2011
Last Post: Apr 3, 2011
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From: Romania

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Biteshock   
Apr 3, 2011
Writing Feedback / SAT essay. "Can succes be disastrous?" [4]

Hello. I'm new here and I would really appreciate any help on my essay. Please be as strict as you can, i really need to improve. Thank you.

So, this is what I've got until now.

Success means achieving what you have planned, fulfill your dreams, getting higher and higher on the social ladder, all in all having the perfect life. But is this a real success? Can success be disastrous? As I see it, success can lead to disasters because of the sacrifices it involves.

In order to be successful people need to make some sacrifices. Some of them are minor like not having time to sleep until the middle of the day and some are major like not having time for your family and friends. Britney Spears, for example, had a huge success in her career as singer but because of that she disregarded her family and started a life of abuses.

Furthermore, when people have success they start to be arrogant and haughty, thinking that the only important persons are themselves. But they don't realize that the higher they are, the harder they fall. For example, my best friend's father was a successful investor very well known in the business market. One day he got an offer for an investment which everyone said is a bad one. Because of his pride, he didn't listen he colleagues warnings and invested all his money. But as expected, he lost everything including the fame and the respect from others, falling in disgrace.

In conclusion, we can see that success not always leads to happy endings so we must be cautious and wise in order to succeed.
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