Posts by liljay9083

liljay9083

Oct 11, 2008

Undergraduate / "I've been a musician for eight years.." - FSU admission essay [6]

i decided to just delete the last part. "along with the help of my role models: my band director, my step-dad, and my mom." because that would lead to a entire new long paragraph. i'm expanding on the main topic of the last paragraph leading into a conclusion. i also fixed all of the contractions. thank you for all of your help :)

liljay9083

Oct 9, 2008

Undergraduate / "I've been a musician for eight years.." - FSU admission essay [6]

should I include the essay topic or could i just delete to allow myself more words?

liljay9083

Oct 9, 2008

Undergraduate / "I've been a musician for eight years.." - FSU admission essay [6]

yes i know that it is abrupt but i'm limited to 500 words. that is also the reason why there are so many contractions.

liljay9083

Oct 9, 2008

Undergraduate / "I've been a musician for eight years.." - FSU admission essay [6]

Of these words, Artes and Mores seem to be the most prevalent in my life.

The word that appealed to me the most was Artes. I've been a musician for eight years and I fully understand how dedication to a skill pays off in the end. Music is definitely an aspect that takes perseverance to succeed in. As we all know, when someone is first leaning an instrument, they definitely don't start at the professional level. When I first started playing piano ...