Undergraduate / "Not anti-social nor a party animal" - Common App [4]

Hey everyone, just like most of you Im looking to get into college, my top schools being Columbia Northeastern and Olin College. The topic I chose, while not being over personal is a bit revealing so I wanted to get some anonomous opinions before having my senior mentor look at it. Thanks a lot! Just as a note, the way i formatted the essay was on purpose. tell me if it doesn't work

I am not one who self pities. At least, I don't think I do. Not anymore than the next person at least.
I feel like throughout my entire life I've always been on the edge of the so called social "scene." That is not to say I do not have friends, or even good friends because I have plenty. As many as I need. I have good friends, best friends, but I'm not the one who gets invited to the parties or the nights on the town. Maybe that is because I've never tried to be that guy. I'm a bit awkward, even at school-sponsored parties. Its well known that I don't drink or smoke and I'm not exactly the life of the party. That's just who I am.

Until 7th or 8th grade it never really mattered. I had known all my friends since Kindergarten so we all just hung out with each other. It was a good time, a happy time, not to sound cliché.

After 8th grade lots of the people whom I'd grown up with transferred to other school. Unfortunately many of the kids who left had been my close friends. Even within a tight group some people are inherently better friends. That just how it works.

We grew older. We matured, albeit slowly, and gradually we grew apart. We developed different interests and different values. As a group we didn't spend as much time together as we used to. I wasn't as close with the people that were left. Some childhood friends had out grown me entirely. That's just how it happens.

As I grew older, spending so much time at home, on the weekends in particular, started to wear on me. So I made a new friend, now my best friend, and spent most of my time with him. New people came and we became friends, but only at school. Group hang outs didn't happen, at least not with me. To be fair I wasn't interested in the same things.

It started to bother me that I really only had one or two close friends who I consistently hung out with. I started to envy people in movies who had what I thought I didn't. I think a low point was wishing, with every ounce of my soul, that I had Ron and Hermione as friends. That wasn't such a good time.

It seems absurd that I should be so upset about such a, in the larger scheme of things, insignificant issue. I had friends. I wasn't bullied. My home life was happy. I did well in school. I guess everybody has something. This was mine.

For nearly two years, 9th and most of 10th grades, I felt like an actor reduced to cameos.
Maybe its because I entered a meaningful and fulfilling relationship. Maybe its because I got older. Maybe its because I matured. Maybe the latter two lead to the former.

I stopped caring about the being part of the "scene." I was happy to be school-only friends. I realized I didn't need a lot of people to make me feel like part of something. It felt good. Really good. Its these people who I know I will never forget. Many of them have graduated, but nothing has changed in our relationship.

So yeah, I am on the edge of that "scene." Not anti-social nor a party animal. But I now know that's where I belong.