Undergraduate / 'Losing my voice and myself in the sea' - USC #2 [6]

Grammar and answering the prompt are my two main concerns. Here's the prompt!

Describe your academic interests and how you plan to pursue them at USC. Please feel free to address your first- and second-choice major selections.

Losing my voice and myself in the sea of red and gold at The Coliseum isn't enough USC for me. My passion for the football program as a child, had sparked my interest in the university as I grew older and more mature. As I perused further about the different opportunities that USC offers, I discovered more and more about myself and my academic interests.

I aspire to contribute to the LA skyline, as well as service the less fortunate. Ultimately, I want to devote my life to programs similar to Habitat for Humanity; intertwining my interest in engineering with my passion for giving back to the community. USC will allow me to build a strong foundation on which I will be able to reach my goals and extend to the less fortunate. My fire to attend the university lies in its ability to not just give its students a solid education, but Viterbi's involvement in outreach programs like Engineers Without Borders and Habitat for Humanity further lets me become involved in the community as I study and grow. USC offers me the potential to become what I aspire to be and fulfill my goals, and being a Trojan would be the first steps towards these goals of mine.

My major is undeclared, but I think I will lean towards Engineering once my college career begins.

Please be harsh. hahaha! The more I get critqued, the better my essay will be and hopefully, a better writer!

In advance, thank you!

Philip Choi