allisongracer
Nov 26, 2008
Undergraduate / UC prompt #2 - my academic experience [4]
"But you don't understand!" Michelle groaned in exasperation, turning nearly crimson. "I really tried, but I guess I'm just not good at Korean. I mean, I literally spent hours trying to figure the verbs out, but I..." she sighed. "Just can't do it. You really can't understand; it's so hard for me."
I paused. Don't understand? Me? I asked myself; just how many times did I repeat those phrases-"I can't do it; I'm bad at this"-during my first few months in the U.S.?
i feel as though this beginning is weak and doesn't convey strong writing skills. You have the right ides agoin but i would sum it up in 1-2 stonger opening sentences rather than dialogue.
hope that helps a bit :D
"But you don't understand!" Michelle groaned in exasperation, turning nearly crimson. "I really tried, but I guess I'm just not good at Korean. I mean, I literally spent hours trying to figure the verbs out, but I..." she sighed. "Just can't do it. You really can't understand; it's so hard for me."
I paused. Don't understand? Me? I asked myself; just how many times did I repeat those phrases-"I can't do it; I'm bad at this"-during my first few months in the U.S.?
i feel as though this beginning is weak and doesn't convey strong writing skills. You have the right ides agoin but i would sum it up in 1-2 stonger opening sentences rather than dialogue.
hope that helps a bit :D