Writing Feedback /
IELTS task2 ---influence of parents on children [4]
hello all, I'm newbie here, looking to improve my English writing skills. this is my first IELTS essay, please work on it, any constructive critics and suggestions are welcomed..I'd be more than grateful if you can grade this essay for me..thank U..
The boys are most influenced by their fathers and girls are most influenced by their mothers. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and details to support your opinion.Children used to imitate the attitude or behavior of their parents, they have a propensity towards what their parents do in a way they communicate or behave, leading to the idea that what the adults do in their current life is the fruit of influence exerted on them since childhood period.
It is thought that boys follow what their fathers do; they listen to the same kind of music, have similar hobbies and go to the gym while the girls learn to cook with their mother and spend the considerable amount of time talking about school life and the latest fashion available in the stores.
However, it is partially wrong to say that fathers have the influence on their sons and mothers on girls. No scientific reason has been found related to this subject. A father can exert the influence on their daughters too so does the mother. Mother could take a greater role over the father in educating their son. In some Far-East countries, the initiatives of taking the boys to the piano course, putting them at prominent university and seeking the prospective spouse usually come from the mother.
On the other hand, fathers leave a countless impression deep down in their daughters' heart. A research said that some women prefer the husband who has a similar personal trait to their father, a proof that the fathers' role on deciding their future could not just be ignored.
In conclusion, parents, either father or mother have put a strong leverage on their children regardless their gender. They will always imitate what their parents do; some even set their parent's behavior or attitude as the way of life in purpose to find the job as well as the lifetime partner.