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Posts by andshewashappy8
Joined: Aug 9, 2012
Last Post: Sep 30, 2012
Threads: 2
Posts: 2  
From: United States of America

Displayed posts: 4
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andshewashappy8   
Sep 30, 2012
Undergraduate / 'I struggled with depression. It affected every aspect of my life' [2]

I struggled with depression. It affected every aspect of my life- my relationship with my parents, siblings, friends, my academic standing in school, and especially with God. It affected me so much that I quit church, made my family almost split up, and made me think of the unthinkable acts. However, through one child, my life was changed.

Because of this child, I was able to overcome my depression and make me a more positive, motivated individual. This child's name was Tiffany and she could barely hear and talk. She attended a program named Milal and I was a volunteer. Every Saturday, I was always partnered up with Tiffany and we did every activities together. Every time I walked into the entrance, she always ran towards me and gave me the biggest hugs and smiles.

I can never forget the words Tiffany tried to say to me one Saturday. She said, "You will be okay" very slowly. She then gave me a hug and I was speechless. Now that I think of this, I knew why Tiffany said this. She understood my problem. These four words that she tried to say clearly gave me confidence and self-esteem. She gave me hope, love, and faith. Because of Tiffany, I was able to start attending my church, start taking leadership roles in school and in this program, and repair my relationships with God and others. My pessimistic attitude changed from negative to positive; I was now looking forward to life with a smile.

Even though Tiffany didn't have what others had which was the ability to speak and hear, she was loving, compassionate, and humble. She gave me the determination to help and encourage others. As I start a new chapter in my life, I will never forget what Tiffany did for me. I will continue to help those who are sick or in need. That is what motivates me every day to do the best I can.

(I don't know if this is touching or good at all.. please comment or fix anything that does not sound grammatically correct. I also want to make my piece a little more elaborate with vocabulary words and different kinds of phrasings... if you guys could please help me on that, that would be SOO great!! thanks!)
andshewashappy8   
Sep 30, 2012
Undergraduate / paragraph about personality; My cousin Tom [4]

Very interesting. But if this is an undergraduate admission, shouldn't it be longer?
maybe you should write how his personality affected/changed you?
andshewashappy8   
Sep 9, 2012
Writing Feedback / Does our happiness come at the cost of others' misery? [2]

Question: Does our happiness come at the cost of others' misery?

After reading The Ones Who Walk Away from Omelas and The Lottery, I realized that we've made misery an essential and necessary part of our happiness. Deep inside our human nature, we are hypocrites, evil, and selfish. In order to pursue our happiness, we tend to hurt others and forget about our actions. For example, in the The Ones Who Walk Away, the author writes about how Omelas is a utopian society with celebrations, wealth, and etc. This utopian society is only perfect if they sacrifice one child to be locked up in a basement with no light, windows, or bathroom. The citizens of Omelas are forced to visit this child once in their lives. Many become angry, upset, or guilty. However, they realize that if they do something to help this child, their happiness would be gone. As a result, many come to terms with the fact that this child has to be a sacrifice for the greater good of Omelas. So, they ignore the child's misery and continue to live a content life. This portrays our society today because we don't like to suffer or be unhappy. Even if they have to make a sacrifice by making someone suffer, they don't mind as long as they are happy. The same thing happens in The Lottery. The lottery, a tradition when a person in the community gets stoned to death by their own friends and family through a lottery, portrays society as evil and hypocrites.
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