Posts by jksai

jksai

Sep 8, 2012

Undergraduate / 'keep on learning' - Common App Transfer Essay Prompt [5]

Thanks for everyone's input.

Felix, about your comments on reasons why I decided to do those things, I believe that the CommonApp has a separate section on explaining unusual and extenuating circumstances that may have affected my education. I believe it may be more appropriate in that section. However, I do agree that I may have to change my tone towards my own state school. Then again, I had to outline reasons per the transfer student essay about my current school as to why I want to transfer. Considering that I spent more time in the state u than at the CC, I chose to elaborate on that. Further, your inquiry as to "why" I need a college out of state is answered in the subsequent sentences, I believe.

Another reason is that I want to transfer to Sarah Lawrence College. Their supplemental essay wants me to specify why I want to transfer to their school. I feel that I might have to just say more things in that essay than in this 'catch-all-for-whatever-LAC' essay by the Common App. I'll post a revised essay but thank you for your inputs. :)

jksai

Aug 31, 2012

Undergraduate / 'going to live with you' - Stanford Letter to Roommate [7]

I like how your letter is casual yet formal at the same time (I think it must be because of the diction). There are some words that need to be replaced, I think, so that it has a greater impact or at the very least, clearer to your roommate. Overall, good job. You sound like you'd be a pretty cool roommate! (esp. cos you can cook, haha).

Hey there my future roommate,

I'm quite phlegmatic, humble and tolerant,

You need a comma after humble (oxford commas and whatnot).

even a bit gloomy

Just some syntax here. :)

I'm a melomaniac

jksai

Aug 30, 2012

Undergraduate / 'keep on learning' - Common App Transfer Essay Prompt [5]

The prompt is: 'Please provide a statement (appr. 250-500 words) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.' I feel that I have addressed the first part of the prompt but not the latter. I have omitted my state's name and CC name, because well, I'm paranoid.

Just recently, I told my mom that I would be going back to the state university in the spring semester. It would be the most economical option for the family, I thought. After graduation, I'll probably get a stable job somewhere in the state and keep that job for years; I would be living a comfortable life. Yet a big part of me could never go back there. Because I know that if I did, I would be settling and settling is the last thing I would ever want to do.

During my senior year of high school, I was dead set on attending a liberal arts college. However, a medley of circumstances prevented me from doing so. Instead, I went to a state university. Although it was not my first choice, I resolved to make my experience there a fulfilling one. I made friendships, participated in student organizations, and even weaved a network with local professionals in the area. But neither my intellectual curiosity nor my creative thirst was sated. The professors were always too busy conducting lectures or working on their research. It was very unrealistic for me to go up to a professor and say, discuss a concept I may find interesting in depth. The fact that graduate students mostly taught the classes did not appeal very much either.

One year later and I am sitting at the [omitted] Community College library typing up this essay. The community college seems like a counterintuitive choice but I'm glad I'm here now. The classes are smaller, my instructors are engaging, and I can focus on my next plan. My next plan being to move out of state.

My plan to move out of state seems juvenile but the college I need cannot be found in state. I'm not looking to go to college just to get a job afterwards. I'm not looking for the archetypal college experience of Greek life, football Fridays, or parties in the weekend either. I'm looking to create myself and refine my interests with other like-minded people. I want to keep on learning because I know there is always something for me to be learned. But most of all, I want to use everything I will have learned to take risks and someday, become someone. Because even though I will not be living a comfortable life, at least I can say that I did not settle and that I tried my hardest to be what I want to be.