wouldyoukim
Sep 30, 2012
Undergraduate / 'Funny but good' - Favorite word and why essay "ugly" for UVA. [3]
I love the humor and boomerang simile in this piece! And I understand that you wanted to digress from using cliche-ish words like commitment, etc, but I think your word choice and explanation are a bit adolescent. It may show what kind of friend and person you are at the intimate level, but other than that it shows little about how you'll interact with students at the school you're applying to.
Also, "I consider myself quite the opposite" is as risky as your essay would be without that last paragraph. Try to find another word that is unique in meaning because it seems like ugly could be replaced with another word to serve the same purpose.
I love the humor and boomerang simile in this piece! And I understand that you wanted to digress from using cliche-ish words like commitment, etc, but I think your word choice and explanation are a bit adolescent. It may show what kind of friend and person you are at the intimate level, but other than that it shows little about how you'll interact with students at the school you're applying to.
Also, "I consider myself quite the opposite" is as risky as your essay would be without that last paragraph. Try to find another word that is unique in meaning because it seems like ugly could be replaced with another word to serve the same purpose.