Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay- Most countries spend a large amount of money in weapons [2]

Most countries spend a large amount of money in weapons to defend themselves though they are not at war. They should spend money to help the citizens in poor and disadvantaged countries. Discuss.

Today every country try to buy high tech weapons and equip their military with them, even though they are in pace. It is clear that technology change everything also weapon, so old weapons do not good any more. Some people say instead of span a lot of budget on weapons and military, we should pay attention to poor citizen and help them. This idea has both advantage and disadvantage.

Security is most highest priority in every country. A country can develop their economy, help to their poor citizen and so on when they are be in pace. A country without a strong military is witness and might attached by enemies and terrorists. Terrorist threat is the one of the reason for allocation most budget in military. Although, having a big military and high tech technology weapons causes countries ready for start a war.

On the other hand, if a country has a strong military without good economic, it will be danger. Witness economic causes increasing rate unemployment, increasing crimes in society and people do not feel safe anymore, so country become poor more every day. Therefore, this country is starving for foods or starting a war, such as poor country in Africa like Somali. However, spend most of budget for poor citizen without attention to military has a same result.

To sum up, in my view every country needs a powerful military and in same time a country must has a great economic so they must have balance between them.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay- Globalization; negatives and positives [2]

Even though globalization affects the world's economies in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss

Globalization is integration of societies, economies, cultures of worldwide through of process of technology, politic and trade. Everything has both advantage and disadvantage, globalization is not an exception. we should considerate both sides.

Globalization has some advantage. Firstly, free trade is which a country does not pay a levy taxes on import or export goods or services. Secondly, globalization increase new market around the world, so every companies try to find new market and earn more customer. Consequently, companies compete with each other to provide goods an service with high quality because people have more choice in new market. Finally, Globalization increases' rate of employment because new market need both skilled and un skill labor. And also globalization increases standard of living of people and reduce poverty. Today people we can immigrate to other country or go to another country for education.

On the other hand, globalization has some disadvantages. Although, globalization increases employment's rate in new market, meanwhile unemployment's rate increase in developed countries. Companies or factories in developed nation try to establish their branches in poor countries because of low cast labor. Salaries are low and work condition are often bad in poor countries. When people immigrate to other country, they transport new virus to destination country. In addition, globalization causes we forget local culture. Today, we listen to foreign music, eat fast foods like KFC, celebrate global events.

To sum up, in my view, we cannot ignore effects of globalization on our life. It is responsible for government in every country to create balance between advantages and disadvantages of globalization.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay- Advances in science and technology [2]

Advances in science and technology and other areas of society in the last 100 years have transformed the way we live as well as postponing the day we die. There is no better time to be alive than now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Today, technology became a part of our life. Advance in technology is incredible. Everything has been changing during the past century for example way that we live, our foods, our hobbies. There is a big point here that must be attention , every change is not good at all.

Thanks to technology, our life today become easier more than the past. We have a lot of electronic device in our home that these machines do everything for us. In the past, people had trouble in communication, but today this problem has solved by internet. In additional, the most important advance of technology or science appear in medicine. we had a lot of disease in the past that there is no cure for them such as Cholera, Pestilence, Tuberculosis, but now we can cure them.

However, with all advantage of technology, there is some dark side. We do our work easier, we do not worry about disease, we have new energy source like nuclear energy, nonetheless we lost our humanity. Nowadays, everything has a value, so we can buy it. Although we live together, we do not know about each outer. We prefer call to somebody or send e-mail to theme instead of go visiting. In small family everybody has a laptop or smart phone, so they spend more time on work with their electronic devices than speak with other.

In conclusion, although I like and enjoy of technology and grateful to science, sometimes I miss for simple and kind people that lived in the past.

Writing Feedback / IELTS Essay- Tobacco and alcohol [2]

Tobacco and alcohol are drugs that cause addition and health problems. Should they be made illegal? Or should all drugs be legalized?

In middle of past century used tobacco became a part of modern societies. many factories established to make cigarette. Consequently many people got a job. In movie every star was smoker and drink alcohol, but today many people believe tobacco and alcohol have bad effects and must be prohibit.

I actually agree with idea that tobacco and alcohol and every kind of drugs must be illegal. I have some reason for that. First of all, all kind of drugs, alcohol and tobacco have bad effect on health of people. Cigarette causes some diseases such as lung cancer. Moreover, nicotine destroy brain's cell. Cigarette not only impact on smokers, also has bad effect on non smokers around them. Smoke is more danger of nicotine. Secondly, we must spend money for use tobacco or alcohol. This cost can be use someplace else, for example for traveling. Finally, government must allocate huge budget for medicines that used for this people And also cigarette pollute air too.

In additional, drinking alcohol damage people live too. Many accident happen when driver is drunk. Forever, this people lost their control on behavior, so they do some illegal act. And I also believe drink alcohol, damage on Liver.

Finally, tobacco and alcohol has a lot of negative effects on our society. Our children, old people are vulnerable. In my opinion government must ban them. It can do by increase taxes on use tobacco or cigarette or alcohol. We must show in media that how much alcohol and tobacco are harmful.