Writing Feedback / Can online education replace the role of traditional education ? [2]

Online education is now available in some countries. This method of education provide education taught by lecture and students can access via internet. However, some people think that online education will not be able to replace the role of traditional education which exist since long time ago. This essay will discuss the advantages and disadvantages between traditional education and online education.

Online education has some advantages for students and school institutions. First, it can save students money from the cost of commuting to the school, because students can access the education in their own house. Second, students can save money for buying clothes for going to school, because some school and universities are required their students use uniform. Third, it is convenient for the students because students can access the material anywhere and anytime, during their holiday overseas or during their spare time. Students do not have strict time to attend the education and they can have time to work and spend money. School institutions also do not necessary to build big buildings with facilities and spend money to pay employees salaries.

There are some disadvantages in online education. Students only stay at home and they loose opportunity to socialize with friends and do not have communication with other people. Online education also not healthy because spend long time in front of computer can cause eye problems and back pain. Other limitation is online education, which based by technology, using internet and computer, not everyone have the capability to operate technologies. Additionally, in some places the internet connections are slow, consequently they have limited access to study.

Traditional education enables students to gain more benefits to students. In traditional education, students can have cooperation and collaboration with their students and teacher as well as participate to social life. Attending school also occurs easier communication because they can have face to face interaction. Teacher also can provide instant feedback to the students. Teacher can give more motivations to the students and teach the students about discipline. Lastly, traditional education provides more employment for the lecture and employees in the school administration, as well as employees which can support the school.

In conclusion, although online education have some beneficial impacts for students, but traditional education provide better place for students to study and socialize with friends. As well as some people limitations to access technology can occurs students can not have education.

Writing Feedback / Essay Practice-Should Fast Food Companies be held responsible for obesity in children [2]

The number of obesity children are now increasing. However, fast food restaurant should not be the only one that causing obesity in children. There are parents who should be responsible for their children. Parents are the ones who take care of their children most of the time, but sometimes parents are too busy with their jobs and do not care about their children health. This essay will argue who should be the most responsible for making children obesity, between parents, government, and the fast food companies.

Parents are the one who taught children about food for the first time. Children at the age of 2-4, usually love eating ice cream, candies, and other kind of sweets. Parents sometimes give sweet treats such as soft drinks to their children when their children do not want to eat. Children usually love soft drinks because it tastes cold and sweet, most children favourites. However, if parents can strictly control their children to avoid fast food and not to introduce fast food restaurant to their children since they were kids, children will not addicted to fast food. Parents can introduce their children to eat a lot of vegetables and fruits instead of taking their children to fast food restaurant. In addition, lifestyles in family also contribute for children health condition, it is better if parents do not put television in their children bedroom and give rules about limited hours for watching television.

Fast food restaurants also should involve in the problem of children obesity. Fast food restaurants should not use toys for promoting their products, because children will be attracted to toys and ask for their parents to buy them fast food to get the toys. Additionally, fast food restaurants can give variation for their menu using healthy ingredients which are safe for children, less fats and less preservatives. The location of fast food restaurants which surrounds school area also make fast foods can be reached easily by children.

Government could also play role to decrease the number of children obesity. The increases fee of taxes for fast food restaurant can make the spread of fast food restaurants in some cities. Banned fast food restaurants advertisements that could be found easily in the street also can reduce attracted children to go to fast food restaurants.

In conclusion, obesity of children caused by fast food restaurant mostly because they attract children with toys. However, there are several things parents and government can do to prevent obesity. Parents can give their children fruits and vegetable. Governments can participate by increasing tax fees and banned advertisements.

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This essay should be in 400-450 words with this kind of topic, I already brain storm in this topic and if you guys have any more ideas to come up with, I will be happy to receive your ideas, feedback, or critics to lead me write better essay :)