Research Papers / Child abuse regulations research rough draft [2]

As a writer you do have some well qualities within this essay. I notice a strong use of statistics, however you add too many quotations. This essay should be paraphrased more, or have more of your own analysis within it.

I see that you want more discipline within the regulations of CPS, however you beat the idea with a rope and are quite redundant. You show some mechanic errors as well within comma's and i think you could use help with your vocabulary and widening it. Other than those few flaws, i found this research to be specific, and intriguing.