ScientistShan
Jan 15, 2014
Scholarship / Need help with the SOP for an Internship at USC [4]
Typo: dint --> do not (a good rule to follow is to not use contractions in formal writing)
Critique: Take this with a grain of salt but when I hear SOP I don't necessarily think of a letter addressed to someone but rather a statement to show passion towards a particular study/program. Given this, I would eliminate the statement's address ("Respected Internship Coordinator, ") and perhaps the formatting of the questions. Rather I think it would be more beneficial to break your SOP into groups (not distinctively) and have them flow properly. I've listed below a template that I feel may fit your current formatting better:
Paragraph 1: Illustrate your passion
Paragraph 2: Give reasons to why you are and would be successful with this internship. State your objective and goal.
Paragraph 3: Demonstrate why USC is best. Perhaps here is a great time to mention prospective advisers and show how their research is interesting to you.
As additional critique, I would focus more on your strengths than weaknesses. This is a chance to prove that you're the right candidate for this internship. Your opening sentence illustrates uncertainty so I would either reword this or simply eliminate it.
Typo: dint --> do not (a good rule to follow is to not use contractions in formal writing)
Critique: Take this with a grain of salt but when I hear SOP I don't necessarily think of a letter addressed to someone but rather a statement to show passion towards a particular study/program. Given this, I would eliminate the statement's address ("Respected Internship Coordinator, ") and perhaps the formatting of the questions. Rather I think it would be more beneficial to break your SOP into groups (not distinctively) and have them flow properly. I've listed below a template that I feel may fit your current formatting better:
Paragraph 1: Illustrate your passion
Paragraph 2: Give reasons to why you are and would be successful with this internship. State your objective and goal.
Paragraph 3: Demonstrate why USC is best. Perhaps here is a great time to mention prospective advisers and show how their research is interesting to you.
As additional critique, I would focus more on your strengths than weaknesses. This is a chance to prove that you're the right candidate for this internship. Your opening sentence illustrates uncertainty so I would either reword this or simply eliminate it.