Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by RichardCastle
Name: Ng Shyue Jer
Joined: Nov 20, 2013
Last Post: Nov 25, 2013
Threads: 1
Posts: 3  
Likes: 1
From: Malaysia
School: Sunway College

Displayed posts: 4
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RichardCastle   
Nov 25, 2013
Undergraduate / UIC has unassailably proven that throughout its seven-year history [5]

It would be a lie when not say every school is unique.

It would be lying to not say that every school is unique.

However, new is always better

Seems rather forced. I think you should give concrete examples in your following sentence and it should be fine then.

I realized I was interested

I realize that I am interested

Could you help with mine?
RichardCastle   
Nov 25, 2013
Undergraduate / 'the National Blue Ribbon' - UC/personal essay [9]

I was held back, the teachers allowing me an extra year to learn English and Armenian, the languages the other children spoke proficiently.

I can sense that this is about language barriers but this sentence is quite vague.

I did better on English tests than my other classmates.

I was already losing, with no literacy skills and not a friend to turn to.

I was losing already at the starting line, with no literacy skills and friends to turn to.

I didn't care about being the best in the class; I liked the satisfaction it brought to me knowing that I could.

My satisfaction did not come from being the best in class, but knowing that I could.

I think the essay is alright. Could you help with mine ?
RichardCastle   
Nov 25, 2013
Undergraduate / It's alright Ma, I'm only Bleeding - UT Austin Essay Topic C [3]

Just some notes about this excellent essay:

The song, artist, decade, and album ? Seems out of place if it is not meant to be a question?

not every song played every moment I could breath. This part doesn't sound right and you should probably rephrase it.

aren't'are not all that random

I think you really did a great job describing your interest while matching the essay prompt.

If you don't mind, can you also review my essay?
RichardCastle   
Nov 22, 2013
Undergraduate / Weddings, Baseball and Economics - U of Minnesota Essay [2]

Please review my essay
This is the essay question: In English, describe your educational interests and goals and what your plans are for when you return to your home country. Please include an explanation of why you would like to study the major you have selected.

I always disapprove of how education is delivered in my country, at least in primary and secondary level: rote learning is as prevalent as memorization of exact answers to match marking schemes. Critical thinking is non-existent in a rigid curriculum in which we have no privilege to defend their viewpoints on historical events. Standing at the receiving end of such system, my desire to study in ways which I could promote my personal understanding of the world did not diminish; it only grew stronger.

Economics is a fascinating subject which I continuously crave for more knowledge. As my range of interests expands from economic history to behavioral economics, I found myself

indulging in books written not only by the academia but also witty journalists like Robert Frank and Michael Lewis. I got the best of both worlds in that I could explain how financial crises could unfold, either by cheap credit-induced asset bubbles or market overreaction due to our irrationality through serious academic research, and also how to dissect odd occurrences in everyday life like an economist. Once, I observed that the weddings which I attend are full of displays of affluence such as massive number of guests and unnecessary yet frequent changing of barely used plates. Refusing to resort to simple answers like cultural difference, since I see us Chinese as statistically prudent spenders, I began looking for an alternative. And that is when I found 'Keeping up with Joneses' in parallel with this situation! Since comments to a wedding is likely dependent on its relative size and expenditure to the others, couples would eventually bid up the price of a wedding and only succeed in raising the yardstick of being 'decent' without feeling any better. If all couples agree to downsize, they (including me in future) would have nice yet affordable weddings altogether. Learning economics has been extremely satisfying and only more so when those 'Aha!' moments appear as I discovered the underlying pattern of life: economic thinking!

My awareness to numbers also improved, especially after reading Nassim Taleb's Fooled by Randomness. I now become critical to the statistical importance of data presented to me. As a baseball fan, I wonder if the Fox broadcasters' claim that historically 80% of the teams who won first two games of the World Series went on to win-it-all would imply that Red Sox is a stronger team, or at least performed above average after consecutive wins. After all, the number does look daunting. However, after using a binomial distribution with a 50-50 chance for both teams and reaching to a similar probability, I could confidently conclude that having an 80% chance does not my initial hypothesis. I would have believed that though, had I been convinced by the face value of the statistics. Besides, watching Professor Schiller's lectures on YouTube has furthered my interest in mathematics. I could really appreciate how central limit theorem, suggests portfolio diversification and substantiates the folk wisdom of 'do not put all eggs into one basket', or how normal distribution is utilized in the Black-Scholes model.

Knowing that UMN is associated with two recent Nobel laureates who contributed to our understanding about the market inspires me to study here. I also look forward to experience the sports culture besides the diverse student body.

Upon graduation, I intend to serve in government bodies such as the Central Bank of Malaysia and The Performance Management & Delivery Unit. Having attended a scholar assessment by the former and spoken to a director from the latter, I realized I would be most gratified working and contributing directly to my country.
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