jujulinka89
Jan 6, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS; Should Fatherhood be recognized as well as the Motherhood? [3]
Thank you for the helpful comment :)
Thank you for the helpful comment :)
jujulinka89
Jan 2, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS; Should Fatherhood be recognized as well as the Motherhood? [3]
Having an IELTS exam in a month and will be really grateful to you, if you check my essay.I know the topic is common, but everyone has its own style of writing :)
It is generally accepted, that it is women`s decision to have or not babies and only their responsibility nurturing them.Some argue. that fathers should be as much involved in bringing up the kids as mothers.My personal view is that, motherhood and fatherhood have equal importance.
If we look at the past, ancient belief is that, women`s role is to stay at home and raise the children.while men are out providing the food.This common structure has changed over the years, which leads to switch of the roles of the father and the mother in the family.
On the one hand, it is of real importance both of the parents to take a part in raising the kids.Influences of both could help the children develop in the best direction.Although, nowadays hardly ever both parents are at home and the kids often do not see one of them much during the working week.But since women got the same rights as men there is no strict division, whose duty is to finance the family.
On the other hand, the number of divorces is increasing each day leading to uncountable single-parent families.Owing the modern and democratic world we live in, it is common the father to have the will to take the right over the children in a court`s case.However, not every government has policy to encourage men to stay at home and raise the kids and at the same time not to feel underestimated.
To summarize, I personally agree with the statement that fatherhood is as much important as motherhood and parenthood means not only giving a birth but raising healthy and good offspring.
Thank you all in advance.I will appreciate all your criticism and notes :))
Having an IELTS exam in a month and will be really grateful to you, if you check my essay.I know the topic is common, but everyone has its own style of writing :)
It is generally accepted, that it is women`s decision to have or not babies and only their responsibility nurturing them.Some argue. that fathers should be as much involved in bringing up the kids as mothers.My personal view is that, motherhood and fatherhood have equal importance.
If we look at the past, ancient belief is that, women`s role is to stay at home and raise the children.while men are out providing the food.This common structure has changed over the years, which leads to switch of the roles of the father and the mother in the family.
On the one hand, it is of real importance both of the parents to take a part in raising the kids.Influences of both could help the children develop in the best direction.Although, nowadays hardly ever both parents are at home and the kids often do not see one of them much during the working week.But since women got the same rights as men there is no strict division, whose duty is to finance the family.
On the other hand, the number of divorces is increasing each day leading to uncountable single-parent families.Owing the modern and democratic world we live in, it is common the father to have the will to take the right over the children in a court`s case.However, not every government has policy to encourage men to stay at home and raise the kids and at the same time not to feel underestimated.
To summarize, I personally agree with the statement that fatherhood is as much important as motherhood and parenthood means not only giving a birth but raising healthy and good offspring.
Thank you all in advance.I will appreciate all your criticism and notes :))