Unanswered [5] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by Loriww
Name: Xu Yijun
Joined: Jan 9, 2014
Last Post: Jan 10, 2014
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  

From: China
School: ECUPL

Displayed posts: 3
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Loriww   
Jan 10, 2014
Writing Feedback / "A simple life" - intro to my essay [5]

A simple life is a free and easy life which people live in without any complications and don't use modern technology.
the sentence above is clearly a definition about simple life. you can express your own feelings and unique experience about it.

And I Need conclousion please
cannot understand what conclusion? more information please
Loriww   
Jan 9, 2014
Writing Feedback / You have enough money to purchase either a house or a business.Which could you prefer ? [6]

The last sentence of every paragraph could be more conclusive to make others grab your meaning at first sight
For example, the last sentence of 1st para could be like
"I would like to have a sense of belonging and soundness by buying a house then I can focus more on my work or study"

And in the 2nd para you can show that you have the investment awareness
Loriww   
Jan 9, 2014
Graduate / Motivation letter for the entry of Master in Supply Chain Management and Logistics at UM [2]

Hi guys,

Need help on my motivation letter about the grammar and content, any pcs of advice or improvements are welcomed.
I am applying for the Msc program of Maastricht University.
Great thanks for all!!

See below of my draft of motivation letter.

Will have graduated with a Bachelor of Business Administration of ECUPL, I am faced with two ways: to find a job or to further my education. With the Internship experiences at two world biggest companies, I find that it's easy to get a job but hard to get promoted to my ideal career in the future only with a bachelor degree. That's why I decline the job offers of my two internship companies and decide to apply the MSc program of UM.

When I worked as intern at ITOCHU Corporation, we faces unexpected events every day in supply chain worldwide and I find it is always those who with professional knowledge about supply chain and logistics solve the problem most efficiently and make the final deal. I dream to become those kinds of employees in my future company. Therefore, I would like to extend my educational background with a master degree of supply chain management to gain the skills and qualifications needed to face out all the challenges and unexpected events during my future working life. What's more, I am eager to live and study in a new environment to meet, chat and make friends with new people. So I decide to join an MSc program abroad.

After deciding learning MSc abroad, I have performed a lot a research on the Internet, and talked with many supervisors in my internship companies , to target which university's master program I can benefit from most . First of all, Netherland is professional in the global trading market. Then I favorite the problem-based learning methods and rather small-scale class of UM. The excellent education quality of SBE also has an international reputation. Besides, the Hi-potential scholarship is so fascinating to all non EU/EEA students, which could greatly release the financial burdens of studding abroad. As all has been mentioned above, my all research has encouraged me to chase an MSc program at your institution.

After graduation, I plan to seek employment in a trading company back in China. My dream workplace is Shanghai, which is my hometown and has great amounts of opportunities. Because it is developing into the biggest trading center of China. I hope to exert my knowledge in Shanghai and continue greater personal development. My career goal is to be the core member of team after about 5 years after my graduation and be the team leader after 10 years. By the time I am well experienced after years of working, I will probably consider applying for MBA program to improve my management. I am convinced the MSc program offered by UM will help me to achieve my career goal.
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