Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]
  

Posts by cgee89
Joined: Jun 7, 2009
Last Post: Jun 11, 2009
Threads: 1
Posts: 2  
From: Taiwan

Displayed posts: 3
sort: Latest first   Oldest first  | 
cgee89   
Jun 10, 2009
Scholarship / What can you contribute to ___ essay? - alumni scholarship [11]

Here's my rough draft, still need a conclusion paragraph though...

As a non-native English speaker and a transfer student, my path to attending ___ is significantly different from most American students. In each stages of my academic journey in America, there were many opportunities for me to utilize my existing talents and also acquire new ones. As expected, I have taken full advantage of every opportunities presented to me. Now, I plan to contribute myself to ___ and expect to define one of the most memorable experiences in my life. My contributions and my experiences at ___ will be essential toward success and satisfaction. They will also help shaping one of the most important stages of my academic journey.

My desire to success academically has been motivated by my immigration status and supported by my personality. In order for me to understand the teaching materials, I have to focus and spend more time studying. My eager to learn and improve my knowledge is the secret for my academic achievement and improvement. I can contribute my passion and motivation in pursuing academic excellence as a part of ___ learning community. My college experience at ___ will also allow me to accomplish my academic goal toward success.

Working as a math tutor at my community college was a remarkable experience and training for me. It has improved my communication skills and patience by teaching students as a group or individual. I was able to lead students to improve their math skills and share my knowledge with them. Now I am planning to apply my tutoring experience at ___ and get more involved in the learning community.

My commitment to community and volunteer services is also another thing that I can bring to ___ community. While working hard and excelling in academic achievement, I still find time to volunteer with numerous organizations. Volunteer to distribute goods to homeless people in downtown Los Angeles and help packaging Christmas presents to children in Third World Countries were unforgettable memories for me. My volunteer experiences have positively influenced my life and made me a well-rounded person. I am planning to keep volunteering while attending ___ and it will make my college experience diverse and valuable.
cgee89   
Jun 10, 2009
Scholarship / What can you contribute to ___ essay? - alumni scholarship [11]

So I'm working on this one-page essay for alumni scholarship, here's the topic:

Many people say, "College is what you make of it." You will have many opportunities to utilize your existing skills and talents as well as acquire new ones while attending ___. With this in mind, in what ways do you plan to contribute to ___ and how will those contributions shape your experience?

Basically, I wrote about my academic achievement, volunteer experience, and leadership potential and how I could contribute to the school from utilizing what I've learned

However, I feel like I need some more examples to make my statement stronger

Anyone can give me some advise or what else should I write about to answer the topic question?

(The topic question is too simple which makes it difficult to answer)

Any help will be appreciated, Thanks!
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳