polotokin
Nov 14, 2014
Writing Feedback / Memory Course - write a letter to the course convenor (IELTS) [2]
Hi guys ! this is my first post on the forum, I am a university student, I am trying to improve my english, in order to pass Ielts. So I am looking for help, so i can improve my skills especially writing.
I invite you to check if there are any mistakes in the essay below, and how i could improve it ?
Thank you.
The subject:
''""
Finding it hard to remember important facts and figures? Improve your memory in 10 weeks with our Memory Course. Places are limited and the course is available for only a short time.
Apply in writing to:
You see the above advertisement for a course designed to help improve your memory. Write a letter to the organiser of the course. In the letter
give some background information about yourself
explain your own problems and why you would like to do the course
enquire about the methods used on the course
enquire about course fees and dates"""
My essay :
'''Dear sir or madam,
In reference to the advertisement brought to you, about the course dedicated to improve the memory of attendants, i write this letter to collect more details about the course.
I am an university student, enrolled in a graduate engineering degree, in my last year, this means that I have to pass a lot of exams, and in addition i am willing to present my final thesis project by the end of the year. Lately i started to worry about my memory performance, because i noticed some trouble when trying to memorize information from my lessons, especially when preparing for exams, or for a public speech and presentations. For these reasons, I have plans of registering in a course to solve my memory's problems.
So my questions are :
How is the course is organised ? is there only one class or there are more than one ? what about the methodology of the course ? is it a practical course or it only covers the theoretical side of improving memory? How much does the course cost ? how many hours per week ? and when the will the programme start ?
I would be so thankful if you could respond to all my questions. And I hope i was precise on them.
I am looking forward to receiving from you.
Best regards,'''
Hi guys ! this is my first post on the forum, I am a university student, I am trying to improve my english, in order to pass Ielts. So I am looking for help, so i can improve my skills especially writing.
I invite you to check if there are any mistakes in the essay below, and how i could improve it ?
Thank you.
The subject:
''""
Finding it hard to remember important facts and figures? Improve your memory in 10 weeks with our Memory Course. Places are limited and the course is available for only a short time.
Apply in writing to:
You see the above advertisement for a course designed to help improve your memory. Write a letter to the organiser of the course. In the letter
give some background information about yourself
explain your own problems and why you would like to do the course
enquire about the methods used on the course
enquire about course fees and dates"""
My essay :
'''Dear sir or madam,
In reference to the advertisement brought to you, about the course dedicated to improve the memory of attendants, i write this letter to collect more details about the course.
I am an university student, enrolled in a graduate engineering degree, in my last year, this means that I have to pass a lot of exams, and in addition i am willing to present my final thesis project by the end of the year. Lately i started to worry about my memory performance, because i noticed some trouble when trying to memorize information from my lessons, especially when preparing for exams, or for a public speech and presentations. For these reasons, I have plans of registering in a course to solve my memory's problems.
So my questions are :
How is the course is organised ? is there only one class or there are more than one ? what about the methodology of the course ? is it a practical course or it only covers the theoretical side of improving memory? How much does the course cost ? how many hours per week ? and when the will the programme start ?
I would be so thankful if you could respond to all my questions. And I hope i was precise on them.
I am looking forward to receiving from you.
Best regards,'''
