bongbang
Dec 4, 2014
Writing Feedback / IELTS: The changes in share price of Outokumpu enterprises - Writing task 1, Line graph [2]
Hello eveybody!!
I am doing this exercise as a self study of IELTS. Please help me to improve my writing.
I am appreciated all your advise. Thank you.
Topic: "The line graph below shows the changes in the share price of Outokumpu companies in euros between January 2006 and December 2010.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below." (150 words)
This is my work: 145 words, 20 mins sharp.
The line graph illustrates the changes in the share price of Outokumpu enterprises in euro from early 2006 to late 2010.
In general, although suffering from some great fluctuations over the 4 year period, the price of share in those companies remained unchange at the end point comparing to the begining.
More specific, there was a significant rise in share price in the first year by doubling the price from slightly under 15 euro to more than 30 euro. Two years after that, although, suffering some small fluctuations, the price of share remained almost unchange. In late 2008, there was a dramatical fall in share price which bottomed at roughly under 10 euro. Finally, in late 2010, after 2 years the companies recovered, the share price saw a gradual increase. However, it could only reach the same level of value as it was in 2006.
Hello eveybody!!
I am doing this exercise as a self study of IELTS. Please help me to improve my writing.
I am appreciated all your advise. Thank you.
Topic: "The line graph below shows the changes in the share price of Outokumpu companies in euros between January 2006 and December 2010.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below." (150 words)
This is my work: 145 words, 20 mins sharp.
The line graph illustrates the changes in the share price of Outokumpu enterprises in euro from early 2006 to late 2010.
In general, although suffering from some great fluctuations over the 4 year period, the price of share in those companies remained unchange at the end point comparing to the begining.
More specific, there was a significant rise in share price in the first year by doubling the price from slightly under 15 euro to more than 30 euro. Two years after that, although, suffering some small fluctuations, the price of share remained almost unchange. In late 2008, there was a dramatical fall in share price which bottomed at roughly under 10 euro. Finally, in late 2010, after 2 years the companies recovered, the share price saw a gradual increase. However, it could only reach the same level of value as it was in 2006.
