Undergraduate / Will admissions sneer at my essay? You decide! Applying UCF. [5]

Thank you! Is this any better?
Along with the wonderful campus that UCF provides comes, more importantly, academics. Luckily for UCF, they win at both ends of the spectrum. From what I've personally heard from Knights, they've all come to agree that the professors actually want you to succeed push you to do your best. That alone is a major factor in deciding if a school is right for me and it's apparent that UCF brings what I need to the table. The B.A. degree in Digital Media that the university offers is the ideal major for me. The degree program falls directly in the track of my career goal of becoming a web developer. At UCF, I feel I'll be getting the best education possible while being in an environment where I'll be able to grow intellectually and prosper. As a result, I'll be able to take advantage of the many job opportunities and internships that Orlando has to offer.

They say love at first sight doesn't exist, but that euphoric feeling overcame me once my eyes were set on UCF. I have done my fair share of college tours, but none left the imprint that UCF did. Once I stepped foot on the vast campus, I didn't feel like I was just touring some boring old college- I felt like I was touring my home. The liveliness of the diverse student population along with the modern atmosphere captivated me. There is no doubt this school will offer me an array of fantastic opportunities and It's quite clear to me that this is the place I want to start my life. I didn't let the impressive freshmen academic profile stop me from setting my goals to this school. I knew it was possible and it gave me all the motivation to strive to do the greatest I could in everything I do.