Writing Feedback / We are blessed with modern tools; Modern technology [8]

well. my English teacher got 6.5 band for my essay but i wonder if it deserves or not..please check my essay and give me correct band score..thanks a lot ^^

topic : modern technology now allows rapid and uncontrollable access to and exchange of information.Far from being beneficial, this is danger to our society? what do you think ?how far do you agree or not

nowadays our society has enjoyed the benefits of having modern technology.We are blessed with modern tools, which could perform to what seemed to be an impossible task in the past like retrieving information in a matter of seconds. However, this often comes with unforseen and undesirable consequences defeating the very objective in the first place. To my mind, modern technology is a bane than a boon.

It cannot be denied that the technological improvement brings forth to us some advantages. Firstly, it helps man communicate local or oversea by writing email, telephone or mobile. A student , for instance, who is studying abroad can talk to his family by chatting and web cam rather than waiting for a hand - writing letters. Secondly, the modern tools also support man in business and studying. It makes better condition to fulfill tasks faster and more convenient. For example, a student spend less time searching information and documents by clicking mouse on google rather than is stuck with many books in library. A business man can deal with his job by using laptop and internet whereas he can still enjoy holiday with his family.

Nevertheless, for every solution technology provides twice as many problems are likely to cause. The modern technology is to some extent underlying causes of negative things in our society. It's Internet that provides an accessible medium for bad elements such as pornography, crimes and so on. the teenagers who are not conscious enough tend to imitate the sexual and violence clips and images on internet. A typical example of this is the massacre in an American school. A pupil killed his classmates by his father 's gun simply because he only acted as a clip he saw. Moreover, the average rate of girls who are pregnant is very soon because of sexual images 's influence.

Modern technology is the key element for the change of lifestyle loosing the moral value. Man abuses on computer in all fields. They are lack of face- face communication and therefore the distance between the generations becomes farther. the old people feel lonely at home and far from their off - springs who are too busy with computers. Thus, the stability of family are being broken day after day. In addition, energetic and meaningful lifestyle is being replaces by wasteful hours in front of computers. Man becomes lazy and isolated from their surroundings.

In conclusion. similar to everything. modern technology has both advantages and drawbacks. I personally think that it depends on how we use the modern tools. People should aware of technology's role to solve its bad effects

Writing Feedback / Causes and Solutions for increasing traffic congestion [6]

well. i wrote an esay about the traffic jam : the reason and solution, Pls check error as well as the structre .thanks a lot ^^

Topic2 : traffic congestion is increasing. Write about the cause as well as the solution to it

In modern life we have to face with many problems one of which is traffic congestion becoming more serious day after day. It is said that the high volume of vehicles, the inadequate infrastructure and the irrational distribution of the develpoment are main reasons for increasing traffic jam

The major cause leading to traffic congestion is the high number of vehicle which was caused by the population and the development of economy. To solve this problem, the government should encourage people to use public transport or vehicles with small size such as bicycles or make tax on private vehicles. Particularly, in some Asia countries such as Viet Nam, the local authorities passed law restricting to the number of vehicles for each family.The methods mentioned above is indeed effective in fact.

That the inadequate infrastructure cannot handle the issue of traffic is also an crucial reason. The public transport such as bus, subway or train is not available and its quality is very bad, especially in the developing countries. Besides, the highway and road network is incapable of meeting the requirement of increasing number of vehicle. Coping with these difficulties, the government should make an investment in the traffic facilties, namely, the publc transport need improving to become more modern and convenient. In addition, it is useful to build overpasses and more lanes in the streets.

Apparently, the irrational distribution and the lack of conscience make the traffic worse and worse.The head offices, the univeristies or hospitals often locate in the centre of city attracting a heavy flow of people in rush hour. To handle this situation, the government should allocate suitably , for instance some unviersity or office will be moved to the outskirt of city. It is necessary to encourage poeple obey the traffic rules which will make greatly change the problem of traffic.

Finally, it's high time we were aware of the disadvatages as well as the solutions to the traffic congestion. With great effort from each individualist and government, our society will be definitely cleaner and well ï organized