Letters / 150-words introductory essay for 6-grader [4]

Hello
I am writing an introductory essay requiring 150 words (actually its an example for my 6-graded cousin). I wanna make sure it's ok... so pls help :)) thanks a lot :))

Dear Sir/Madam
My name is Nguyen Doan Anh Thu and I am from Vietnam. I am in the second semester of grade 9. I'd like to tell you about my background, achievements and goals.

I was born and grew up in Ho Chi Minh city, Vietnam. I go to Tran Dai Nghia school and spent my past four years here. At Tran Dai Nghia, I focus in achieving my goals such as having good results in my classes, acquiring knowledge in English, Biology, Chemistry, which are my favorite subjects.

In my leisure time, I usually play the piano for fun or to relax. Additionally, I enjoy watching movies and reading fictional books. I also do researches on fields such as English or Science since my dream is to be a doctor. This is also the reason why I take part in competitions about these fields, from which I gain achievements and advance in my learning.

Thank you, and I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Nguyen Doan Anh Thu.