ballstowall
Feb 24, 2016
Undergraduate / Statement of Intent for a Transfer Application - My Interest in Japan [2]
Hello Everyone! ***If you just want to skip to the essay, it is at the bottom.***
I have here today a statement of intent for the University of Florida. My main concerns with the essay at hand are issues with grammar, concise and clear language, and expanding upon my reasons for why I am interested in Japanese culture and why UF is most suitable for me without going over my 200 hundred word limit. I am having trouble trimming the essay down to make room for adding layers onto my reasons.
Stuff I want to add into the essay, but can't for lack of room:
My interest in Japan (I don't want to sound like I am just gushing over Japan, but rather trying to give a list of stuff that has my interest in regards to Japanese culture)
-I love the quirky nature of the Japanese culture. The contrast between my culture (U.S.) and theirs.
-The respect they have and demonstrate towards their peers.
-The food is delicious to say the least. I am fan of all things seafood :)
-I have read history/ folklore on Japan and just am engrossed in what it has to say. I would love to visit some of the historical sites in Japan i.e. the castles and shrines.
-Language and writing is very pleasant
-etc
Why I would like to attend UF:
-Strong and reputable language program
-The location is ideal for me. As of this moment I am a tad bit sick of living in this frozen tundra that is my home :P
-From what I've seen the community at this school seems very active and friendly.
-Available study abroad scholarships
-Options for smaller classes
-Friends and Family live in the area
-The Air National Guard is generous in this state/ I can afford it.
More details: There are two essays that UF requires. Just to give an idea what the other essay covers, so as not to be redundant in this piece. The topic was:
Please provide any other information about yourself that you feel will help this college make an admission decision. This may include work, research, volunteer activities or other experiences pertaining to the degree program. (200 word limit)
In the other essay I primarily talked about how I started seriously self studying the language, what I've done (Taking the JLPT N4) , and what I plan to do in the future with WWOOF this summer. I'm trying not to overlap any information, so I can give as much unique info about me and basically sell myself to UF.
The essay
What are the core skills and knowledge you hope to acquire by completing a degree in this major and how do you plan to apply these when you graduate? (200 word limit)
Current word count: 200
During my time as a youth I would often be at my parent's gym until closing. To pass the time I would occasionally watch TV; one day I came across anime. I was enthralled by the style, pacing, and language of the show. This initial encounter began my exploration of Japanese culture. The honor and integrity in which the Japanese people live by fascinated me. Ever since, I have only continued my self study of the culture, which has lead me to my eventual decision to pick this as my major in college.
The University of Florida's well known Language program that keeps students accountable for their progress, requiring 3rd year students to take the JLPT 3, is the best suited place for me to excel in my studies. I hope to equip myself with a deeper understanding of the language and culture so I too can engage in more meaningful cultural exchanges and develop lasting relationships in Japan after I graduate.
Upon graduation I would like to pursue teaching English in Japan. I want the Japanese people to have an opportunity to learn from a native to better share my language and culture, and to promote communication in Japan.
Hello Everyone! ***If you just want to skip to the essay, it is at the bottom.***
I have here today a statement of intent for the University of Florida. My main concerns with the essay at hand are issues with grammar, concise and clear language, and expanding upon my reasons for why I am interested in Japanese culture and why UF is most suitable for me without going over my 200 hundred word limit. I am having trouble trimming the essay down to make room for adding layers onto my reasons.
Stuff I want to add into the essay, but can't for lack of room:
My interest in Japan (I don't want to sound like I am just gushing over Japan, but rather trying to give a list of stuff that has my interest in regards to Japanese culture)
-I love the quirky nature of the Japanese culture. The contrast between my culture (U.S.) and theirs.
-The respect they have and demonstrate towards their peers.
-The food is delicious to say the least. I am fan of all things seafood :)
-I have read history/ folklore on Japan and just am engrossed in what it has to say. I would love to visit some of the historical sites in Japan i.e. the castles and shrines.
-Language and writing is very pleasant
-etc
Why I would like to attend UF:
-Strong and reputable language program
-The location is ideal for me. As of this moment I am a tad bit sick of living in this frozen tundra that is my home :P
-From what I've seen the community at this school seems very active and friendly.
-Available study abroad scholarships
-Options for smaller classes
-Friends and Family live in the area
-The Air National Guard is generous in this state/ I can afford it.
More details: There are two essays that UF requires. Just to give an idea what the other essay covers, so as not to be redundant in this piece. The topic was:
Please provide any other information about yourself that you feel will help this college make an admission decision. This may include work, research, volunteer activities or other experiences pertaining to the degree program. (200 word limit)
In the other essay I primarily talked about how I started seriously self studying the language, what I've done (Taking the JLPT N4) , and what I plan to do in the future with WWOOF this summer. I'm trying not to overlap any information, so I can give as much unique info about me and basically sell myself to UF.
The essay
Interest in Japan
What are the core skills and knowledge you hope to acquire by completing a degree in this major and how do you plan to apply these when you graduate? (200 word limit)
Current word count: 200
During my time as a youth I would often be at my parent's gym until closing. To pass the time I would occasionally watch TV; one day I came across anime. I was enthralled by the style, pacing, and language of the show. This initial encounter began my exploration of Japanese culture. The honor and integrity in which the Japanese people live by fascinated me. Ever since, I have only continued my self study of the culture, which has lead me to my eventual decision to pick this as my major in college.
The University of Florida's well known Language program that keeps students accountable for their progress, requiring 3rd year students to take the JLPT 3, is the best suited place for me to excel in my studies. I hope to equip myself with a deeper understanding of the language and culture so I too can engage in more meaningful cultural exchanges and develop lasting relationships in Japan after I graduate.
Upon graduation I would like to pursue teaching English in Japan. I want the Japanese people to have an opportunity to learn from a native to better share my language and culture, and to promote communication in Japan.