What If Tomorrow Never Comes; Feed back on Poem

What If Tomorrow Never Comes

Today the rain fell.
Today the worst came to worst.
Today everything went wrong.
But oh well right...

Today my heart broke.
Today my life ended.
Today my whole world crumbled.
But oh well right...

Tomorrow the sun will shine.
Tomorrow only the best may happen.
Tomorrow everything will go right.
Isn't that right?

Tomorrow my heart will still beat.
Tomorrow I'll still breath.
Tomorrow my entire world will fix itself.
Isn't that right?

But until then,
The rain shall fall
Until then,
My heart shall break
Until then, Dad, your still gone...

I was supposed to free write something for a creative writing class I'm taking. This is what came out. I really enjoyed the idea that I was playing with here, because it's an actual feeling that I've experienced. So I want to make this just flat out better. I would like for my lines to flow so to speak, but right now I feel like they aren't making any sense. Please, any suggestions will be more than appreciated.

hi, im really glad that we still have some 'Shakesqeares' n 'Wordsworths' with us!..:-)..First let me compliment you on your beauthjful writing skills...Have you heard of a 'Haiku'?..Its a type of poem in which you describe your feelings with the help of seasons...and that's exactly what you've done!..:-) n its marvellous!:-) Your in the right direction..just keep working ahead.:-)

I really liked your poem. One thing I would suggest changing is the "I'm" in "Tomorrow I'll still breath." to "I will" because it flows better when there isn't a conjunction plus the sentence before and after says I will.

Overall great job!

Yes, this poem should be featured! The emotions that arise from this piece... simply incredible!

One thing to fix: Dad, YOU'RE still gone