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'I served as the Treasurer and Events coordinator' - LEADERSHIP & INFLUENCE QUESTION



chukky24 1 / 2  
Aug 16, 2016   #1
Chevening is looking for individuals that will be future leaders or influencers in their home countries. Explain how you meet this requirement, using clear examples of your own leadership and influencing skills to support your answer.

(minimum word count: 50 words, maximum word count: 500 words)


As part of my extracurricular activities during my university days, I served as the Treasurer and Events coordinator at the University of Portsmouth Nigerian Students Society (NSS). This position has given me the privilege to develop my team working, leadership and negotiation skills and I have learnt to be very well organised. Also I learnt how to work under pressure with little or no supervision. It has indeed given me the opportunity to put the learning from my course into real life situations.

Just as the say goes that charity begins at home. I've been able to demonstrate these leadership skills during our Independence Day (Nigeria) celebration on the 1st of October 2015. I and my team members needed to make this special day a remarkable one because several administrations has come and gone but none ever celebrated the Nigerian Independence Day at the University of Portsmouth. As the events coordinator, I told my team members that all hands must be on deck in other to make the program a success. We started by publishing about the program. We went further to print posters and went on to the university radio station (Pure FM) to advertise the event. We also organised fund raising activities which helped to secure some funds for the event. The event featured a lot of international students from Asia and other European countries who came to share and celebrate the beautiful culture of Nigeria with us. We had a budget for 100 students but the turnout was massive as we recorded a number of 250 students. Everyone had fun as we already made plans for unforeseen contingencies. The rest are history as the NSS received good feedback and well done messages from the participants.

Also, during my International year one at the International College Portsmouth, I served as the module and Student representatives, I enjoyed relating to students via email and telephone and working to solve their problems in relation to their academic queries. All these further developed my communication, commercial awareness and problem solving skills.

I was the Head boy and Health Prefect (boys) in my A level and High school days. During my A levels I saw that things were not going well with student welfare and this in turn affected the moral lifestyle of the students. On appointment as the head boy, I was able to work out and implement modalities that improved the lifestyle of students as at the time. I was able to achieve this with the assistance of other school representatives and liaising with the school authorities. For instance, I and my team organised seminars on good conduct and upright living. We were able to achieve this because of our exemplary lifestyle. My lifestyle as a leader in different position has influenced so many students and I have improved greatly in all my experiences. Truly, I believe that we are the future leaders of tomorrow.

Caronte16 1 / 1  
Aug 16, 2016   #2
Hello!! Chukky24!

I think your essay is well structured, and you emphize exactly what is required.

An observation:
For instance, Ime and my team.

That's all. It's good for you to know I'm not an native english speaker.
Wish you luck! Bye!
hirani03 36 / 47  
Aug 17, 2016   #3
Hi chukky24. Whatta wonderful experience you've ever had.
I try to give you some corrections. I hope these are helpful.

1. ... because several administrations hashave come and gone ...

2. As the events FF0000]event coordinator, (...) to make the program a success.

3. The rest areis history as the NSS received ...

You just need to pay attention in subject verb agreement. Keep writing..
justivy03 - / 2280  
Aug 17, 2016   #4
Hi Aaron, first of all, WELCOME to the Essay Forum Family, we hope to provide you with the most accurate feedback in order for you to submit a well written and confident essay.

This is my 2nd year to review articles for the Chevening Scholarships and I believe there are a lot of success stories on EF students or writers who applied to this scholarship and most of their essays are focused on the detailed elaboration of their leadership skills and I must say, I believe you had streamlined your essay to serve it's purpose which is a very good technique in approaching such writing project.

Furthermore, I have a few suggestions, though, mind your plural forms, some of the verbs or words doesn't need to plural and if they don't need to be, you don't have to, refrain from using the word "also" in the beginning of your paragraph let alone your sentence. Lastly, put your examples in the 2nd or 3rd paragraph and leave your final paragraph for your life lessons and personal opinions.

I wish you the best of luck and do let us know what happens with your application.


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