Writing an USC Transfer Essay. Please help, any comments/suggestions is greatly appreciated!
USC's speaker series "What Matters to Me and Why" asks faculty and staff to reflect on their values, beliefs, and motivations. Presenters talk about choices they have made, difficulties encountered, and commitments solidified. Write an essay about an event or experience that helped you learn what is important to you and why it is important.
ESSAY 2#: In an essay of 300 words or less, choose one extracurricular activity, work experience, or community service project from the list you provided on the application and explain why you initially chose it, why you continued with it, and how you benefited from it. (I need to cut down a few words since it's over 300 words)
Imagine being enveloped by clear, aqua currents with vibrant life, feeling light and free. That's how I felt scuba diving for the first time in the beautiful Bunaken Islands in Indonesia. The wonders of nature left me at awe and left a major imprint in my life actions. I became an ardent supporter of the environment and was driven to involve myself in activities that improve the environment.
My interest in the environment and American politics has led me to take action in the nation's capital. Interning in Washington, DC as part of the Sophomore Exploration program at The Washington Center last summer was a big step that I took towards achieving my goals. My responsibility as a legislative intern in Environment America involved researching, lobbying and campaigning for better transportation policies that would improve overall community life. My efforts led to the Capitol Building steps, where we anxiously awaited the voting results of the Climate Change bill. Celebration filled the air as the bill passed, making it the first most comprehensive climate change policy ever considered and passed by Congress. To be able to be a part of that groundbreaking moment in American history was life changing and inspired me to take actions in my passions.
The knowledge gained from Washington, DC contributed to me being elected as the Associate Director of Student Legislative Affairs at my college's Student Government. As an active leader of 37,000 students, I serve and represent them in government in key higher education issues. Leading a nine member team, we work collectively to raise student awareness and support on higher education matters, as well as advocating to specific state legislators. Understanding how legislation works and having experienced how to lead grassroots campaigns, has greatly helped me my efforts to promote political civic engagement at my campus.
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Does it fully answer the question? I think the conclusion is kind of weak.
USC's speaker series "What Matters to Me and Why" asks faculty and staff to reflect on their values, beliefs, and motivations. Presenters talk about choices they have made, difficulties encountered, and commitments solidified. Write an essay about an event or experience that helped you learn what is important to you and why it is important.
ESSAY 2#: In an essay of 300 words or less, choose one extracurricular activity, work experience, or community service project from the list you provided on the application and explain why you initially chose it, why you continued with it, and how you benefited from it. (I need to cut down a few words since it's over 300 words)
Imagine being enveloped by clear, aqua currents with vibrant life, feeling light and free. That's how I felt scuba diving for the first time in the beautiful Bunaken Islands in Indonesia. The wonders of nature left me at awe and left a major imprint in my life actions. I became an ardent supporter of the environment and was driven to involve myself in activities that improve the environment.
My interest in the environment and American politics has led me to take action in the nation's capital. Interning in Washington, DC as part of the Sophomore Exploration program at The Washington Center last summer was a big step that I took towards achieving my goals. My responsibility as a legislative intern in Environment America involved researching, lobbying and campaigning for better transportation policies that would improve overall community life. My efforts led to the Capitol Building steps, where we anxiously awaited the voting results of the Climate Change bill. Celebration filled the air as the bill passed, making it the first most comprehensive climate change policy ever considered and passed by Congress. To be able to be a part of that groundbreaking moment in American history was life changing and inspired me to take actions in my passions.
The knowledge gained from Washington, DC contributed to me being elected as the Associate Director of Student Legislative Affairs at my college's Student Government. As an active leader of 37,000 students, I serve and represent them in government in key higher education issues. Leading a nine member team, we work collectively to raise student awareness and support on higher education matters, as well as advocating to specific state legislators. Understanding how legislation works and having experienced how to lead grassroots campaigns, has greatly helped me my efforts to promote political civic engagement at my campus.
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Does it fully answer the question? I think the conclusion is kind of weak.