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|ISO ideas writing "WHO AM I?" for NFL Pitch Brochure
NEW - NFL Draft Prospects brochure I need some guidance on concise writing for brochure I'm writing to pitch to...
UndergraduatePMG_SportsBiz - 1 day ago / — -
|Martial arts - supplemental essay on Jiu Jitsu - UNC
NEW - personal qualities plus a story Prompt: Discuss one of your personal qualities and share a story, anecdote, or...
Undergraduateaviatorspings - Sep 27, 2023 / — -
|My Father and the Gym - undergraduate admissions
NEW - Gymming brought me happiness and helped me a lot What happens when parents put their frail skinny boy...
UndergraduateAryking - Sep 27, 2023 / — -
|Week-long bursts of passion - my Questbridge personal essay
NEW - Forewarning: This is a rough, rough draft. I'd appreciate some help and feedback on what I do have...
UndergraduateHonda_civic - Sep 26, 2023 / — -
|COMMON APP ESSAY REVIEW (essay on personal growth)
2 - The essay tends to be a bit confusing as you move from the plant experience to your personal experience....
Undergraduateyurii06xx - Sep 16, 2023 / Holt - Sep 26, 2023
|New country arrival - QuestBridge-Personal Essay
UndergraduateNguyebui - Sep 25, 2023 / Nguyebui - Sep 26, 2023
|Common App / "Why did I take a gap year" essay / international student / early decision in november
2 - You spent too much time explaining the concept of the gap year. The focus should be on why you...
Undergraduategigibsz - Sep 12, 2023 / Holt - Sep 26, 2023
|Statement Of Intent for School of Visual Arts BFA Fine Arts
NEW - Summary: Hello! I am trying to transfer to the School of Visual arts in New York and we are...
UndergraduateGracefulRoseThor - Sep 25, 2023 / — -
|GAP YEAR ESSAY FOR COMMONAPP
UndergraduateNaveed123 - Sep 8, 2023 / Holt - Sep 24, 2023
|My journey of independence and family bonds Essay (Personal statement)
2 - The essay does not really show how you overcame an obstacle. It comes across more as you just complaining...
Undergraduateccbubblegirl - Sep 7, 2023 / Holt - Sep 24, 2023
|Common App main essay: Mother's Battle Changed my life
UndergraduateVgreene1659 - Sep 22, 2023 / — -
|Chameleon of Roleplay - Questbridge personal statement
NEW - experiences, challenges that shaped my identity Prompt: We are interested in learning more about the context in which...
Undergraduatehayebal - Sep 20, 2023 / — -
|Rubber Bands College Essay INTRO paragraph
2 - I find the paragraph to be highly redundant and lacking in focus. There is too much emphasis on the...
Undergraduatertm7272 - Sep 6, 2023 / Holt - Sep 18, 2023
|Essay about telling the story that shaped my characters
3 - @Roandan I feel like you did not understand the topic you had to write about. This seems like a...
UndergraduateRoandan - Sep 4, 2023 / HITZYBITZYTYTY - Sep 16, 2023
|Journey in programming - Motivation for applying to UNIST (Entrance Essay)
Undergraduatekanghyun3130 - Sep 4, 2023 / kanghyun3130 - Sep 16, 2023
|Stepping into the gates - UGRAD statement of purpose
2 - Focus on developing paragraph 3. That is where you purpose seems to lie, but seems unexplored for the most...
UndergraduateMominat - Aug 30, 2023 / Holt - Sep 16, 2023
|"I can do it" app eassy for Computer Science major GKS_U
2 - The GKS-U application essays follow a highly specific question and answer format. You must respond to a series of...
UndergraduateMinahil - Aug 26, 2023 / Holt - Sep 12, 2023
|Growing Up In The Family Restaurant
NEW - Growing Up In The Family Restaurant The experience of working in my family restaurant taught me the importance...
Undergraduatesebastian323 - Aug 28, 2023 / — -
|Technology - Statement of Purpose for UGRAD undergrad exchange program 2024
3 - @basit123 I think you should discuss some more ideas that you are going to perform in the future...
Undergraduatebasit123 - Aug 23, 2023 / Minahil - Aug 26, 2023
|BEING A QUEER MUSLIM - COMMON APP ESSAY FOR UMICH!
2 - Somehow the presentation seems incomplete to me. I am looking for some reference as to how the Muslim community...
Undergraduateraindrops - Aug 1, 2023 / Holt - Aug 8, 2023
|"That's it, I quit Reading Bowl!" - college app essay
2 - Without knowing what prompt you are responding to from the common app list, I would have to say that...
Undergraduatenikhiltadepalli - Jul 28, 2023 / Holt - Aug 6, 2023
|Personal Statement to apply for Internal Medicine Residency USMLE
2 - Please revise your personal statement. A personal statement should not focus on your academic achievements or medical accomplishments. Rather,...
UndergraduateRushel - Jul 27, 2023 / Holt - Aug 4, 2023
|Windows on Williams Fly-in Essay "Describe your neighborhood and how it impacts you" 500 word limit
Undergraduatewax338 - Jun 28, 2023 / wax338 - Jul 16, 2023
|The New School for AAS in Fashion Design
2 - The overall presentation is strong and well informed. You have a clear idea of how you see your future...
Undergraduatesweets9 - Jul 11, 2023 / Holt - Jul 12, 2023
|Energy engineering - Personal statement - GKS-U 2024
2 - The essay can do with some professional editing to help with the clarity of the content. However, the confusing...
Undergraduatebibi04 - May 23, 2023 / Holt - May 24, 2023
|Describe your dream and the efforts you have made so far to achieve it and your future plan for it
2 - There is no real ambition being depicted in this essay. You only speak of an interest in computers in...
Undergraduatekenzierivan - May 21, 2023 / Holt - May 22, 2023
|The hardest thing on earth is choosing what matters - University Transfer
2 - Your response to the prompt is entirely incorrect. You wrote a character analysis of Anakin Skywalker / Darth Vader....
Undergraduatenotsocoolgio - Apr 10, 2023 / Holt - Apr 13, 2023
|Common app essay on personal development based off a light hearted situation - feed back
Undergraduateacceptedpiggy4f - Apr 4, 2023 / Holt - Apr 6, 2023
|Why you want to participate in this Pre-College Wall Street program
2 - The program is looking for participants who already have some sort of relevant experience in trading stocks and investments....
Undergraduatemayte2908 - Mar 15, 2023 / Holt - Mar 17, 2023
|How does MIT align with your goals (e.g., academic, personal, career, extracurricular, etc.)?*
2 - The response is good, but vague. There is no clearly defined goal for each aspect indicated in the prompt....
Undergraduatedeepak212 - Mar 12, 2023 / Holt - Mar 14, 2023
|Physical therapy and kinesiology - QUESTBRIDGE PREP SCHOLAR Q!
2 - Okay, you cannot use an exposure when you were 7 years for this prompt. What you provided is neither...
Undergraduatecelbel - Mar 7, 2023 / Holt - Mar 8, 2023
|Global Liberal Arts - your interests and how you would like to explore those interests.
2 - Your response is actually irrelevant to the writing instructions. You were expected to discuss your technical skills and its...
UndergraduateDIVER - Feb 23, 2023 / Holt - Feb 24, 2023
|Select one thing you have focused on the most from the time you entered high school until now.
2 - You are using a personal insight to respond to what should be a community and social skills development response....
Undergraduatearisuw - Feb 21, 2023 / Holt - Feb 22, 2023
|Reasons to choose Waterloo and Computer engineering, educational goals & interest in chosen program
Undergraduatesami21 - Feb 11, 2023 / sami21 - Feb 11, 2023
|The importance of expression - FIT Admissions Essay for Fashion Business Management
2 - The perfect FIT candidate does not only have the heart for fashion and business. He does not only have...
Undergraduateroseriv - Jan 30, 2023 / Holt - Jan 30, 2023
|Passion for the environment - Statement of purpose admissions essay appreciate
3 - 1- Never quote negative things in your essay if it is not to bring a positive reaction in your...
Undergraduateah9087 - Jan 18, 2023 / crlian - Jan 24, 2023
|Blessing of God - UBC essay what is important to you and why?
3 - I think other than the content, making your essay more cohesive would make your thoughts come up better to...
Undergraduateapricotmoss - Jan 15, 2023 / rudraksh - Jan 22, 2023
|Affinity for mathematics - Why Waterloo
2 - The passion for the actual Math application is missing. The reviewer could View this response as lacking in actual...
UndergraduateGyroZepelli - Jan 18, 2023 / Holt - Jan 19, 2023
|"Cool kid" - UBC Tell us about yourself essay
2 - The response to this prompt cannot be of the collective opinion kind. That is what you have written here....
UndergraduatePony4590 - Jan 14, 2023 / Holt - Jan 15, 2023
|To impart knowledge - objectives and how these are appropriate to your long-range goals.
UndergraduateLucarian - Jan 9, 2023 / Lucarian - Jan 14, 2023
|Software engineering and computer engineering - Waterloo essay
3 - @doris101 I have to agree with Holt as well. The more specific you can be, the better. Show that...
Undergraduatedoris101 - Jan 12, 2023 / kokosi - Jan 13, 2023
|"Writing to escape"- Common App Prompt
2 - The way you approached this writing and what it reflects of your personal character, insights, and hobbies lead me...
Undergraduatenamuvior - Jan 11, 2023 / Holt - Jan 11, 2023
|"The lesson of hard work and persistence" - personal statement
2 - I strongly urge you to remove the introductory paragraph in this statement. Since the word requirement is less than...
Undergraduateanukk - Jan 9, 2023 / Holt - Jan 9, 2023
|Pushing myself - WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO YOU?
2 - The prompt only asks for one important topic. Therefore you have to choose between motivation and self. discipline. I...
Undergraduatekngsleyw - Jan 7, 2023 / Holt - Jan 8, 2023
|Computer science and software engineering - What are your educational goals - Waterloo
3 - Hey there, I had to answer this question as well! I think you should concentrate on why you decided...
Undergraduatemuhammadso - Jan 5, 2023 / Slyrae - Jan 7, 2023
|UBC Sauder School of Business - Personal Profile Essay - RESPONSE TO A PROBLEM /UNFAMILIAR SITUATION
2 - This is certainly a good response that covers both the problem and unfamiliar situation prompt. I like that you...
Undergraduatetxd123 - Jan 5, 2023 / Holt - Jan 6, 2023
|"Outgoing," "passionate," and "holistic" - personal statement!
2 - Why are you shouting at the reader? Do you want me to have your account suspended for disrespect? You...
UndergraduateSunilPal - Jan 5, 2023 / Holt - Jan 5, 2023
|UBC Sauder School of Business - Personal Profile Essay - RESPONSE TO A PROBLEM /UNFAMILIAR SITUATION
Undergraduatecatlover420 - Dec 31, 2022 / SunilPal - Jan 5, 2023
|Anesthesiologist Assistant Personal Statement. How my background suits this profession.
UndergraduateAbian - Jan 1, 2023 / crlian - Jan 4, 2023
|Strong Healthcare Foundations: Statement of Intent Review
2 - You have read the course description very well. You have noted the courses in the study list showing that...
Undergraduatejetta - Jan 3, 2023 / Holt - Jan 4, 2023
|The recycling depot - UBC Sauder Application: Personal Profile
2 - You seem to have had an assistant leadership position at the recycling plant. It is important that you acknowledge...
Undergraduatemlkm - Jan 2, 2023 / Holt - Jan 2, 2023
|We age and decay. MIT : Describe the world you come from essay
UndergraduateTheDoctor2035 - Jan 1, 2023 / TheDoctor2035 - Jan 1, 2023
|Stipendium Hungaricum Motivation Letter BSc on ChemEng
2 - The first paragraph would be more impressive if it does not refer to any age aspect. Use the first...
Undergraduateiudex - Dec 31, 2022 / Holt - Jan 1, 2023
|A goal-driven person - academic objectives and indicate how these are appropriate to your goals.
3 - The educator expects to see in your answer:" academic objectives". But in your first sentence, you do not mention...
UndergraduateAksh2005 - Dec 30, 2022 / hanablaaaa - Dec 30, 2022
|The Craft - Using your volunteer/work experiences, describe the topics or issues that you
2 - The essay is too wordy for a supplemental essay. The situations take too long to get to the point...
Undergraduatenataliely - Dec 29, 2022 / Holt - Dec 30, 2022
|Without Economics - my UK personal statement. How can I improve it?
2 - This is nota thought that just pops into one's head. You should go back further into establishing this....
Undergraduatetenebris - Dec 26, 2022 / Holt - Dec 26, 2022
|Childlish dreams - mathematics
Undergraduatenschaakk - Dec 22, 2022 / nschaakk - Dec 23, 2022
|GKS-U Medicine Study Plan - 2024
Undergraduatebvalkyrianzz - Dec 23, 2022 / bvalkyrianzz - Dec 23, 2022
|Learning languages but Participating - study plan - Korea scholarship
2 - While the essay is freeflowing and easy reading, it does not really relate clear information in relation to the...
Undergraduateminhhanhkcm - Dec 20, 2022 / Holt - Dec 21, 2022
|Serving and Nurturing People as A Journalism Student
3 - What I see most in most of the essays of this forum is that people believe that writing sensationalist...
Undergraduatechelseaanasts - Dec 17, 2022 / bvalkyrianzz - Dec 18, 2022
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