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|About the failure in the American Dream
5 - Thanks for your help Holt! And have a good night....
Undergraduatemelokour - 03:34am / melokour - 05:57am
|Staying alone at home - I had finally grown up. Common App prompt #5
3 - That's a great suggestion, Holt! I'll incorporate that in and get back to you. Thank you very much :)...
Undergraduatenyanpasu - 03:24am / nyanpasu - 04:04am
|My achievements - extracurricular or volunteer activities in which you participate.
4 - It isn't hard to fix. Since you are responding to a prompt provided by the university, the correct format...
Undergraduatechikomm16 - 02:45am / Holt - 03:04am
|Columbia Supplement - 1. Why Columbia? 2. Why these majors?
2 - hello, I have read your essay and here is my opinion(1) Please research about the qualities in term facility...
Undergraduateangeli6778 - 12:18am / chikomm16 - 02:42am
|How to add more about myself in Cornell CAS application essay?
9 - You do a great job explaining your interests in those subjects, but your reason on "why Cornell" is a...
Undergraduateliane - Oct 23, 2016 / angeli6778 - Yesterday
|How will you explore your intellectual and academic interests at the University of Pennsylvania?
2 - This was cohesive, specific, and really gets across your passion for education to help your country. The only thing...
Undergraduateprajain - Yesterday / angeli6778 - Yesterday
|Penn offers the next stage of an intellectual journey - Application Essay for Wharton (Penn)
4 - The latest version:-)Ever since the first time I walked through Huntsman Hall in 2013, joining the Wharton School of...
UndergraduateJASONSUN99 - Yesterday / JASONSUN99 - Yesterday
|My "WHY NYU?" Essay (for Class of 2021)- (NYU Steinhardt)
2 - Hey Zahran, your 5 months of working on this essay really paid off. There are no major problems with...
Undergraduatezahra998 - Yesterday / Holt - Yesterday
|Child of a thousand hills from Rwanda
5 - Hey mary, i tried to alter the essay and this is what i have managed to get at.1. Tell...
UndergraduateAshleigh - Oct 22, 2016 / Ashleigh - Yesterday
|My village and its customs that changed my life!
27 - 1. Since this is not an activity that you did only once, then the choice is "visits". The plural...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 21, 2016 / Holt - Yesterday
|Application Essay What got me into architecture, how does it manifest itself in my everyday life?
5 - When I was very young, I was always artistic, but I never thought I was good enough to make...
UndergraduateValltax - Oct 26, 2016 / Valltax - Yesterday
|Opportunity is my main concern with choosing a school. FIT TRANSFER ADMISSIONS ESSAY - why FIT?
2 - Joanna, your essay is currently in need of revision in terms of content and chronology. You seem to also...
Undergraduatejoannam789 - Oct 26, 2016 / Holt - Yesterday
|Essay: people I might live with
4 - @Holt, many thanks for your comprehensive feedback. I will take everything you wrote into account and will try to...
UndergraduateAlter - Oct 25, 2016 / Alter - Oct 26, 2016
|Discovering art in kindergarten. Entrance essay to art school!
2 - 1st Paragraph - ...dad always often... (two time adjectives are contradicting, pick one.)3rd Paragraph - ...leaving me,(stop/dot) But art... - ...that I had...
UndergraduateLuludrea - Oct 26, 2016 / ichephe - Oct 26, 2016
|Describe your interest and experience in your chosen major (300-400 words)
3 - Thank you for your advice, but I think you've misunderstood some key things.To begin with, I'm not majoring in...
Undergraduatetaariya - Oct 26, 2016 / taariya - Oct 26, 2016
|The most important section in a student's live (personal statement for CUHK)
2 - Karen, I am wondering if your personal statement for this application has instructions that it should be divided into...
UndergraduatekarenL - Oct 26, 2016 / Holt - Oct 26, 2016
|"The trouble is, you think you have time"; essay about myself. G-PA
3 - I like your writing, little touched. But i think we need some correctionI found the proverb to be true...
Undergraduatejohnta123 - Oct 23, 2016 / prettyinside - Oct 26, 2016
|I'm from Long An, a province in the south of Vietnam. Help me with my hometown. Very grateful.
2 - Hi Ngocuyen,Let me just reworked what you have written. Please take a look.I come from Long An. It is...
Undergraduatenguyenhuyen - Oct 17, 2016 / ichanpants89 - Oct 25, 2016
|Why History is Worth Studying
8 - Well, after your review i discovered that all your attention focused in the past events.I would recommend you to...
Undergraduateyjung17 - Oct 21, 2016 / chikomm16 - Oct 25, 2016
|Edit my Upenn essay (explore your interest)
11 - Hi, i think you should focus more on realistic goals that attending Upenn would empower you to achieve.To explore...
Undergraduateprajain - Oct 10, 2016 / chikomm16 - Oct 25, 2016
|A personal and National Triumph
8 - If this is the format that you are comfortable using, then this is what we shall use Juanita. I...
UndergraduateAE02022504 - Oct 25, 2016 / Holt - Oct 25, 2016
|My homosexuality - Overcoming adversity and embracing individualism - common app essay
4 - Kush, go ahead and write the essay even if it goes over the limit. I can always help you...
Undergraduatekdesai710 - Oct 25, 2016 / Holt - Oct 25, 2016
|Every year I buy 2 presents for my sister on her birthdays. Common App
2 - Ozdemir, this is not exactly the kind of response that is expected of this essay. There is no real...
Undergraduateozdemir - Oct 25, 2016 / Holt - Oct 25, 2016
|The motto Ut Prosim will always be in my mind... College Essay for Virginia Tech
5 - Awesome, thank you very much!...
Undergraduategabbyo - Oct 23, 2016 / gabbyo - Oct 25, 2016
|My Transition into a Stronger Reader
2 - Hello,I think your basic thought process here is great. However, I think you should approach this topic from a...
Undergraduateyjung17 - Oct 24, 2016 / admission2012 - Oct 24, 2016
|My path to love and understanding
2 - I really like how you're going about this situation. But if there is one advice I can give you,...
Undergraduateprofxav - Oct 24, 2016 / yjung17 - Oct 24, 2016
|Having a conversation is not easy and effortless for me. My struggle with social anxiety.
2 - Dear Teresa, here are some advices for your writing, feel free to correct my responses,Growing up I was an...
Undergraduatezyx678 - Oct 24, 2016 / fadhilmd25 - Oct 24, 2016
|How the loss of my mother marked my transition from childhood to adulthood
2 - Well Joe, this story of self realization is a nice touch to your transition story. However, it lacks one...
UndergraduateJoeCuccs12 - Oct 24, 2016 / Holt - Oct 24, 2016
|My recommendations (ACCOUNTING AND BUSINESS)
2 - Both your letters are too long and does not present your strengths in the best possible manner. Review the...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 24, 2016 / Holt - Oct 24, 2016
|"What does not destroy me makes me stronger" - Princeton Supplement prompt 5
13 - I think you're right ! Thanks Holt!!...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 21, 2016 / inav321 - Oct 24, 2016
|Comment and explanation section of pffa Princeton
12 - The rate used in the conversion of Nepali rupee to US dollars is: $1=Rs.107.My father is the single earner...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 23, 2016 / inav321 - Oct 24, 2016
|Say Yes to Saying No by Melody Jung
6 - There are just some simple revisions to be applied to the essay at this point. It really came out...
Undergraduateyjung17 - Oct 21, 2016 / Holt - Oct 24, 2016
|Occidental College; a vital stepping-stone in focusing my interests and shaping my view of the world
4 - Thanks for the clarification. In my opinion, you will need to make some adjustments to your current essay in...
Undergraduatecamshrages - Oct 20, 2016 / Holt - Oct 24, 2016
|"The direction in which education starts a man will determine his future in life" Pennsylvania essay
2 - Dear rwelles, here are some advices for your writing, feel free to correct my responses,I want to find the...
Undergraduaterwelles - Oct 23, 2016 / fadhilmd25 - Oct 24, 2016
|"Art and Reality as Paint Strokes " - School of Visual Arts - SVA - Statement of Intent
2 - Your essay delivers a lot of information but does not really explain your passion behind your love of arts....
UndergraduateMellvei - Oct 23, 2016 / Holt - Oct 24, 2016
|"Washington D.C., yeah I can do this" I coached myself as my flight number was called.
2 - Hii Rmay.. Overall, it is a great writing, but i found several mistakes. Lemme show you.The plan was to arrive...
UndergraduateRmay - Oct 23, 2016 / Giansy11 - Oct 23, 2016
|Common App Essay -- Cooking with my Polish Grandmother (does it say enough about me?)
2 - ... of digits and telephone cards, since she lived in Poland ...When I got the chance to speak to...
Undergraduatebkornak - Oct 23, 2016 / Giansy11 - Oct 23, 2016
|Dance has taught me to be better. Common Application Essay about a meaningful talent
2 - I was 4 years old when the first time I dance first dancers at a small talent show. ......
Undergraduatenirmitiparekh - Oct 23, 2016 / Giansy11 - Oct 23, 2016
|What qualities or Characteristics can you contribute to UCF - Humble, Strong, Liberated Mindset
3 - Jax, this is a pretty good essay. It really shows the kind of contribution that you can make to...
UndergraduateJaxkirch - Oct 22, 2016 / Holt - Oct 23, 2016
|Why Columbia? Better to ask: Why Core Curriculum?
2 - Aris, I think you should reorganize some paragraphs in your essay for better effect. The positioning of your sentences...
UndergraduateMetanoia - Oct 23, 2016 / Holt - Oct 23, 2016
|Georgia Tech essay prompt - If you had the opportunity to create a class, what would it be and why?
3 - Oh... right. I forgot that Creative Writing was a thing, haha. Thank you for reminding me! I'll think of...
Undergraduatenyanpasu - Oct 23, 2016 / nyanpasu - Oct 23, 2016
|What is a small goal I hope to accomplish in the near or far future? Sleep.
3 - Holt you are absolutely a saint! thank you!...
Undergraduatejohnta123 - Oct 22, 2016 / johnta123 - Oct 23, 2016
|There is one thing only a few people know about me, I produce music: personal statement
2 - Tim, your essay is unique and really interesting to read. It presents a hidden side of you that may...
UndergraduateTVLAERE - Oct 22, 2016 / Holt - Oct 23, 2016
|CommonApp Essay Prompt2 --Princess Charming (Not exactly finished)
7 - Hi, Thank you for your suggestion. Instead of talking about the failure of Soccer game, my intention is to use...
UndergraduateJASMINEkk - Oct 17, 2016 / Jazzystan0420 - Oct 23, 2016
|Free for all isn't too free...
3 - Thank you so much Holt :)...
UndergraduateWriterWriter1 - Oct 22, 2016 / WriterWriter1 - Oct 22, 2016
|Extracurricular activities, work - need guidance on improvement in language and grammar!
5 - hello brother,, let me give some corrections for you writing..1.Organising (organizing)debate competition and story 2. debate competition and story...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 22, 2016 / Bekuk22 - Oct 22, 2016
|Busy two years in Nepal - spending free time on previous vacations
3 - Thank you very much Holt! That helped!!...
Undergraduateinav321 - Oct 22, 2016 / inav321 - Oct 22, 2016
|Failed Job Interview: Common App Prompt 2
3 - Thanks! I was really worried about whether my essay was boring, and I'm glad you found enjoyment in it....
Undergraduatetaariya - Oct 20, 2016 / taariya - Oct 22, 2016
|Reflect on a time in the last few years when you felt genuine excitement learning about something.
6 - Hi Chizaram, here is my piece for you. Hope it will satisfy your purpose.I had only 7 years when...
Undergraduatechizy7 - Oct 20, 2016 / Ahmadi015 - Oct 21, 2016
|'Growing up I had separated parents' - What was the environment you were raised?
2 - Anthony, the essay is good and almost on the mark in terms of discussing the kind of environment and...
UndergraduateAnthonyVardaro - Oct 21, 2016 / Holt - Oct 21, 2016
|Admissions Essay, "My Fathers Killer"
5 - Hi! I have some advice for you!Losing my father was the most difficult thing I have ever had to...
UndergraduateDomjoliver - Oct 16, 2016 / kiki23 - Oct 21, 2016
|Syracuse University never interested me. My passion for social work and helping others changed it.
4 - Kara, there does not really seem to be a strong influence regarding your desire to enroll at Syracuse. There...
Undergraduatehayenk17 - Oct 19, 2016 / Holt - Oct 21, 2016
|Did MICKEY MOUSE JUST TRY TO KIDNAP ME OR SHOW ME SOMETHING IMPORTANT?
2 - Hi! I have some feedback for you!...out of the trollies trolleys not being able to contain my emotion......at...
Undergraduatebenvb1234 - Oct 20, 2016 / kiki23 - Oct 21, 2016
|"Not Just a Job" Transition to adulthood. Entrance essay for Ohio State.
4 - Since you are supposed to talk about your transition to adulthood, why not concentrate on the job aspect from...
Undergraduatehayenk17 - Oct 19, 2016 / Holt - Oct 21, 2016
|The orchestra. Common App: The lessons we take from failure
3 - Thank you for these tips! If you don't mind answering a few more questions, did you feel like the...
Undergraduateangeli6778 - Oct 20, 2016 / angeli6778 - Oct 20, 2016
|Moving to America and getting more freedom
5 - This is the prompt I am writing. Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so...
Undergraduatejpatel254 - Oct 20, 2016 / jpatel254 - Oct 20, 2016
|"Write about something that you love to do" (200 words or fewer) - Yale essay
8 - Hi Chizaram, I'm glad that we are able to help, even more so, we are happy to hear that...
Undergraduatechizy7 - Oct 17, 2016 / justivy03 - Oct 20, 2016
|Painting for the school art show and a disaster. Common app: Describe a problem you've solved.
2 - This is quite a strong narrative essay in response to the prompt. However, it seems to start at the...
Undergraduatesel7sel - Oct 20, 2016 / Holt - Oct 20, 2016
|Description about me as a personal statement
9 - Great. Thank you very much. Wish you the best...
UndergraduateNhatKhang - Oct 17, 2016 / NhatKhang - Oct 20, 2016
|My Best Friend Let Me Down- UW Eau Claire
5 - This is a really good start. Try to show rather than tell the audience about what you went through....
Undergraduatesorfina123 - Oct 15, 2016 / hayenk17 - Oct 19, 2016
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