Unanswered [1] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width   Posts: 7


TOEFL; Ability to Relate Well to people Vs Studying Hard



aliceNN 8 / 21  
Sep 17, 2013   #1
Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
For success in a future job, the ability to relate well to people is more important than studying hard in school.

To agree or disagree the statement that as far as getting a successful job in the future concerned, good ability of relating to people is more crucial than studying hard in the univeirsity is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, if one coniders the issue carefully, he or she may agree the title statement as I do.

First of all, friends is a treasure with respect to either our daylife or our career.Relating well to people can bring plenty of merits to future job. Having a good ability of relate to people means you have a number of friends in a variety of fields, imagine when you are in trouble, you have a lot of people who have good relationship with you, so you can ask for your friends to help you solve this problem as soon as possible, even an esy phone call, instend of a series of complex solutions.

Futuermore, no matter who you are a top-level managers of a company or a low-level employee of that company, relating well to people is also a importent issue. If top-level managers want to make a project successful , have a good relationship with their subordinaries is the prerequisit for the managers' work complete successfully, managers should listen to their employees needs and complaints about this job, pay much patiant and care to them. Consequently, make a good relationship with them.

on the ither side, if a low-level empolyee desire to enhance his position, it's fairly important to have a good relationship with their boss, only if the employee is considered excellent in his boss's eyes, he will be more possile to enhance position.

However, someone may maintain that good specify knowledge is more crucial for future job. Studying harder in school , getting a good resume and absorbing lots of working knowledge, which can make these graduates more competitive than other applicants in one certain job.But imagine it, a person who is good at working knowledge but has an poorly relate to people, and a person who has a good ability of relating to people but his working knowlodge is less better than the former , which person do you want to be? I think majority of people would choose the former because it has more chance than the latter in terms of getting good jobs in the future.

In my point of view, I do really prefer to improve my ability of relating people and make more friends rather than studying hard in school.

dumi 1 / 6793  
Sep 17, 2013   #2
To agree or disagree the statement that as far as getting a successful job in the future concerned, good ability of relating to people is more crucial than studying hard in the university is a matter of balancing its pros and cons. However, if one considers the issue carefully, he or she may agree the title statement as I do.

Well.... this is the format I suggest for the introduction paragraph of this task.
OP aliceNN 8 / 21  
Sep 17, 2013   #3
okay,thxx!I will try!
btw,how about the structure and idea of my passage?
: )
dumi 1 / 6793  
Sep 17, 2013   #4
First of all, friends is a treasure with respect to either our daylife or our career.

Your prompt speaks about relating to people and it talks about this from a career perspective. It is not referring to making friends. I feel this sentence goes a bit out of topic from what your prompt suggests. Give some thought about what your prompt asks. In my view, it talks about your ability to relate well with other people help you progress in your career than your qualifications. For example, if you are a highly educated person, but still if you have a wrong attitude and annoys your bosses, then you would not be able to get your promotions.
OP aliceNN 8 / 21  
Sep 17, 2013   #5
okay...I got it ! and how about the last paragraph? do u think I should write more or just have an breif summary?
dumi 1 / 6793  
Sep 18, 2013   #6
[quote=aliceNN]However, someone may maintain that good specifyspecific knowledge is more crucial for future job. Studying harder in school , getting a good resumeobtaining good credentials and absorbingacquiringlots of working knowledge, which can make these graduates more competitive than other applicants in one certain jobwhen they compete for jobs .But imagine it, a person who is good at working knowledge but has an poorly relate to people, and a person who has a good ability of relating to people but his working knowledge is less better than the former , which person do you want to be? I think majority of people would choose the former because it has more chance than the latter in terms of getting good jobs in the future.

Well... I don't say your writing is bad. You can write well, but I feel you can improve a lot on your essay structure.
OP aliceNN 8 / 21  
Sep 18, 2013   #7
okay,thanks a lot , Duminda! I will practice this structure right away.


Home / Writing Feedback / TOEFL; Ability to Relate Well to people Vs Studying Hard
Need Writing or Editing Help?
Fill out one of these forms:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳

Academic AI Writer:
Custom AI Writer ◳