IELTS: 65 ages and over population between 1940-2040

The graph line provides information about the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three countries: Japan, Sweden and the USA.

These countries are upward trends in the population aged 6 and over during that period. The both of Sweden and the USA increase steadily despite of the USA decrease constanly from 1980 to 2020 and then increase to 2040 at approxiately 26 percent. Beside that the rise of Japan more remarkable than the USA and Sweden. With only 5 percent from the begining of the observe, it decreases continuosly to under 5 percent during period from 1940 to early 1980s, afterward rise sharply, in particular at early 2030s it is forcasted that will increase from 10 percent to about 27 percent at 2040.

In conclusion, the chart distingiush surpassing of Janpan to the USA and Sweden to occupy the first place in the people aged 65 and over.

p/s: the first time i've posted so hope you guys help me to improve my writing skill.

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  the chart line
  

Hey nice writing, but i have a comment. Since the chart has a portion that extends all the way to 2040, you should mention that there are projection in there and perhaps mention that populations after 2013 are not for certain.

Otherwise you have few grammar mistake in which I would humbly try to correct.

-> The line graph


-> despite/in spite of

Overall, all three countries show an increase in the percentage population aged 65 and above during the period under review.


... This is a pretty confusing sentence.
Both Sweden and the USA show a steady upward trend until early nineteen eighties. Then the US slowed down and maintained marginally the same level and this trend is expected to continue till 2020. However, closer to the year 2000, Sweden shows a pick up in trend in upward direction. This trend is expected to continue till 2020.

It's always better to have short sentences with more clarity.

Your tone should be set for report writing and therefore it should have a more formal presentation. For example;


.... the word "remarkable" does not help you maintain a reporting style. Also this sentence fails to deliver a logical reason. This is what I suggest;

Japan is expected to record the highest proportion level of aged population by 2040 exceeding the levels of the USA and Sweden by 5% and 2.5% respectively.



.... "distinguish" makes this sentence questionable as to what you try to mean. You need to re-phrase your conclusion.


Yes.... this is a good place for you to improve your writing skills. We will help you at our best!
Cheers!

The provided line graph delineates the fluctuation about the proportion of population aged 65 and over in-between three countries- Japan, Sweden and USA. By observing the graph it can be clear that people lives longer as the time passes by.

From 1940 to 1985 Japanese residents who are above 65 years old, slightly fell down from 5% to 3%, but in the meantime in USA and Sweden, it rose up from 8% to 15% and from 7% to 14%. After 1985 in Japan it rose up marginally till 2030 to 10% and after that, there was a noticeably increased within a year and that is 25%, while USA and Sweden rose steadily to approximately 20-22%. In 2040 Japan ended up in 27% and USA and Sweden respectively 23% and 26%.