"The Catcher in the Rye" Motif: Sex.

Ok , so I'm suppose to write a paragraph about a motif (sex) in the novel "The Catcher in the Rye" for chapters 1-9 (around there)

Hope you guys can help me proofread for common mistakes. The most common mistakes I make are things like expression errors or comma splices.

Motif: Sex
Sex is a motif that frequently reoccurs in the novel, "The Catcher in the Rye". This motif seems to play a significant role affecting the surroundings and thoughts of Holden Caulfield. Most of the time this motif appears in the novel, the sole purpose of its meaning is to display their manliness to others. When Holden suspects that Stradlater had sex with Jane, it made him mad that it drove him crazy. However, on the other hand with Ackley, he ignores whatever he claims to have done with other girls. There is a different reaction for each person's scenario. But in the end, when "sex" is approached to Holden and if the "sex" does not involve him, he tries not to think about it too much. Then there are times when Holden encounters sexual arousals, and thinking about his past sex experience which he creates the impression that he enjoys talking about it. All these aspects of Holden suggest that he is a type of person who only wants the attention for himself in some ways. When he is in the public eye, he does not express his true feelings but constantly lies instead. In his mind, all he does is call people phony or other negative comments. This motif partially proves that he is full of himself, yet does not receives what he wants.

Well, a comma splice is nothing difficult to understand. It's when you write the way you talk, you might put two sentences together using a comma instead of a period (like this sentence). That is incorrect, but easy to fix:

It's when you write the way you talk. You might put two sentences together using a comma instead of a period

Sex is a motif that frequently occurs (I think "occurs" is best here, because it's not unnecessarily complicated. Frequently reoccurs is a little redundant) in the novel, "The Catcher in the Rye". This motif seems to play a significant role affecting (try saying something different about how it affects them)----> the surroundings and thoughts of Holden Caulfield.

Keep your verb tense consistent:
When Holden suspects that Stradlater had sex with Jane, it makes...drives him...

:-)