Essay on Structural Violence as Explained by Paul Farmer's Anthropology

The essay's topic basically asks to reflect on a reading (the anthropological book, Infections and Inequalities by Paul Farmer). Hopefully, I don't bore you all too much :-)

According to the medical anthropologist Paul Farmer, structural violence predominantly affects the world's socioeconomically poor. The structures of the modern society, divided between the "impoverished" and the "affluent," deny the large percentage of the world's population access to medical care--medical care that is disdainfully deemed to be cost-ineffective for the poor. As a result, the world's impoverished, as said by the theologian Pablo Richard, "are obliged to die in the silence of history" behind a blinding wall, dividing the rich and the poor.

In Infections and Inequalities: the Modern Plagues, Paul Farmer explains that this "wall" is ievident in the incorrect claims of infectious disease being "emerging" or "new," made when the world's rich are affected--although the poor, mostly confined to Least Developed Countries, have been and are still suffering in silence. Specifically, Farmer comments that the common statement of tuberculosis as "reemerging" due to renewed outbreaks in Europe and North America as "another reminder of the invisibility of the poor" who in places like Haiti, Africa, and South Asia have been the victims of tuberculosis--a disease that can be easily cured with the application of effective therapy that is inaccessible or rather, "cost-ineffective" for the poor. Due to poverty, the poor are limited in their desperate efforts to better their health--and are limited even in their own lives through the structural violence of societies.

Paul Farmer explains that "life choices are structured by racism, sexism, political violence, and grinding poverty" in On Suffering and Structural Violence: A View from Below. With the appalling stories of Acephie and Chouchou, he describes poverty, interlocked with structural violence, as the sole cause of their horrific deaths Structural violence is not caused by an individual's actions or will; instead, it is defined and structured by an individual's social status since his or her socioeconomic status limits his or her life. The silence in which the poor have to suffer, the inadequate access to medical care, the hunger, the suffering, and numerous deaths around the world are all effects of structural violence--a violence that could be prevented or assuaged if the affluent confront the social inequalities rather than arguing about "cultural differences."

I didn't try (or will) for interesting essay but rather an essay that clearly explains the points of Paul Farmer (I realize that most of you have never even heard of the book) but I simply wanted the grammar help of EssayForum and to know whether or not my essay is clear in terms of diction and syntax. Thanks~!

I would take out the "--" and just end the second sentence at that; it seems too wordy. The last sentence also reads a teeny bit stilted.

Maybe you could say, "The invisible structures of modern society divide humanity into the impoverished and the affluent, denying a large percentage of the world's population access to expensive medical care. As a result, the wealthy minority ignores the world's impoverished majority, as if there were a blinding wall between the rich and the poor. The theologian Pablo Richard reminds us that the poor are "obliged to die in the silence of history" because..." (add in your own "fun" here about cultural hegemony; the upper class writes the history books, etc., etc.)

I think you need to explain why you included the quote - it does tie in nicely with the second paragraph with suffering in silence!


Just sprinkling in a few words to make it sound stronger!


This part of the paragraph will be clearer if you break your sentences into smaller chunks: "Specifically, Farmer comments about the frequent statement that tuberculosis is "reemerging" due to renewed outbreaks in Europe and North America. In places like Haiti, Africa, and South Asia, thousands (I don't know if this is correct; maybe look it up? It's probably more, right?) have been the victims of this disease, one that can be easily cured with the application of effective therapy. This serves as "another reminder of the invisibility of the poor," who cannot gain access to expensive live-saving treatments, and it is a prime example of structural violence in societies."


"By describing the appalling stories of Acephie and Chouchou, he demonstrates how structural violence is closely interlocked with poverty, and how it is ultimately responsible for their deaths."


This should probably be two sentences, too. How does one's socioeconomic status limit his or her life? Show that you know what this means by giving an example! Think about access to opportunities, (invisible) barriers people face...


I like where you're going here, but it'd be better if the sentence structure stayed parallel and/or if you tied it in to the big picture: "The effects of structural violence are widespread but overlooked. Hunger, suffering, inadequate access to medical care, and deaths: these could be prevented or assuaged if the affluent confront social inequalities rather than arguing about "cultural differences." ---- I'm not sure what you mean by cultural differences here, so maybe end with an example of said differences. What exactly is the developed world bickering about instead of the actual problem?

Overall, great job! I don't think I ever read about this topic in my anthro classes, but just reading it taught me something new...and made me miss school a little :)

-B
p.s. any help with my essay would be very much appreciated!

Here is an idea:
...a blinding wall that divides the rich and the poor.

not necessary, though...just an idea.

...even in their own lives by the structural violence of societies.


ha ha, sounds like you think your essay is boring. Well, when you are writing about some other person's work, your ability to control whether the content is boring is limited! But if you get a little idea, a little inspiration about a meaningful theme, your writing is touched by it, and you can convey a little extra insight. It might not happen if this work by Farmer does not inspire you, but if it does inspire you, you can let your writing reflect that inspiration.

Your writing is seriously excellent.

I like all the advices, Britt! And thanks for that change in that sentence, Kevin; it really clarifies the ending. It flows better too for some reason. I kept feeling, while writing the essay, that I was using too many "poor" and it didn't sound right at the end there but putting "that" instead of using the phrase as a modifier definitely sets it right :-)

Thanks again!

just wanted to make sure we caught this one.

And yeah, the reason it "flows" better (whatever that means) is because we removed a comma. Commas make reading like stop and go traffic at rush hour when you want to get home.