Dear all,
I would appreciate some help to criticize my SoP. I am confused as how to contain all of these points completely within the 1000 word limit while still conveying a focused, sustained, and convincing narrative. Which one I should cut down and which one needs to be fleshed out more. Also with transitions, style, flow, and phrasing/word choices, given I am not a native speaker. This is my top choice so I want them to know every single reason of why I dream to join the program. Some experience points I have omitted will be put on my CV. I attach here the guidelines from my target school as a reference.
Any help would be very much appreciated! Thank you in advance.
Part 1: Introduce yourself, your interests and motivations
Part 2: Summarize your undergraduate and previous graduate career
Part 3: Discuss the relevance of your recent and current activities
Part 4: Elaborate on your academic interests
"Please describe your aptitude and motivation for graduate study in your area of specialization, including your preparation for this field of study, your academic plans or research interests, and your future career goals. Please be specific about why [campus] would be a good intellectual fit for you."
"Did he just play God?". That was my first thought when in May 2010 I learned that a team led by J. Craig Venter successfully created the first synthetic genomes that worked in a living organism: JCVI-syn 1.0. Although I understood this was not literally the case - as only the transplanted DNA were synthesized in vitro while the cellular machineries were already pre-existed - I was still enthralled since this seminal breakthrough not only it broke the boundaries on the definition of life as we know it, but more importantly, what we can potentially do with it. I saw the opportunity of plugging genes from different species into the minimal genome as a chassis; raising the prospect of building a "super-cell" with a pre-designed blueprint capable to do any programmed task, from producing useful chemicals to detecting toxic substances in the environment.
Around the same time, I received a copy of Nature Biotechnology, December 2009 issue which introduced me to the term "synthetic biology" and concepts such as metabolic engineering, standardization of genetic parts, and tunable genetic circuits. Upon further exploration, I learned on the success of Dr. Jay Keasling in synthesizing the precursor of antimalarial drug artemisinin in yeast. This allowed for a cost-effective production and more widespread use of the drug; potentially saving millions of lives. This profound achievement convinced me on the tremendous potential of synthetic biology to revolutionize the future. From that moment, I decided my career goal is to be a proficient synthetic biologist. And to obtain the necessary skills, I need to pursue a PhD.
I have been long fascinated on potential utilization of microbes for sustainability applications. For this reason, I did my undergraduate thesis at [XXX] studying oyster mushroom growth under five different magnetic field doses under the supervision of Dr. [supervisor 1]. Despite the slow start - due to the relatively lengthy time required to cultivate mushroom bodies for the experiments and frequent contaminations occurring which means repeating the entire procedure - I kept pushing forward by being more careful and learn from every mistake along the way. My data indicated that magnetic field of 0.8 mT increases fruiting body production by 17%, whereas 1.6 mT and 2.0 mT delay the mushroom harvest by 18 days. These results shed more light on fungal physiology and could be applied to improve mushroom production. From this first exposure, I learned that research can be frustrating, but the key to success is perseverance.
Eager to gain more research experience and be more competitive for PhD application, I enrolled in the [XXX] at [XXX]. My research project is on the development of Microbial Electrochemical Cells (MXC) for H2O2 production from organic waste, supervised by [supervisor 2]. Having had no experimental logistics ready as the project was just being commenced; I got the ball rolling by purchasing a simple H-type cell and along with [XXX], a PhD student in the lab, initiated a series of preliminary runs to familiarize ourselves with the setup. However, leafing through the literature, we realized there were not any standardized methodologies to MXC optimization. Unsure of where to start, I brought this to Dr. [supervisor 2] and he kindly advised me: "Just keep working in the lab and start failing". Indeed, this was exactly what happened. We had a dozen of failed iterations of MXC design before finally settled with two which permitted us an ease in operation, sampling, and data gathering. Inspired by a recent paper, we separated the optimization of each MXC chambers. During the cathodic optimization, we obtained the H2O2 yield of ~60 mg/L and current generation of ~8.0 mA using a RVC 80 cathode at poised potential of -0.5 V and high aeration after 3 h. Continuous MXC run using a mixed inoculum generated current after 18 days of operation, peaked at 3.5 mA (1.59 A/m2) at day 24. The pride is not only in seeing my contribution being recognized in a peer-reviewed publication, [journal name], but more importantly in learning that in research we must embrace uncertainty. There are many possible ways to approach a problem, but without trying, we will never know which one would work. We will never reach the goal.
In summer 2015, I pursued an internship project at [XXX], [XXX] under the [XXX] Certificate, as one of the first two [XXX] students selected for the program. My project is on techno-economic analysis of 1,4-butanediol (BDO) production from sugarcane molasses, supervised by [supervisor 3]. By adapting a design based on patents owned by [XXX] on BDO production methods using an engineered E. coli strain, I demonstrated that building a molasses-to-BDO plant in South Africa could generate ZAR 2 billion over 10 years, with ROI of ~720% and payback period of only 1.5 months. For much of the beginnings, I felt truly challenged due to being a student with no prior background on the topic, yet now having to finish in three months what a team of chemical engineering majors typically assigned for a semester. However, Dr. [supervisor 3] kept encouraging me that I more to learn rather than to get the right results. Reinvigorated by this support, I renewed my efforts thus completing the project on time; presenting my results as a technical report and two presentations to the research group. From these, I acknowledged that learning is a tiring endeavor, but the valuable knowledge to be obtained is always worth the pain. Hence, I have to always confident in myself, not be dispirited by any obstacles, and be willing to communicate in asking for help.
My achievements in Biology Olympiad competitions during high school have opened up possibilities I had never imagined before, and therefore, I would like to empower others who wish to pursue the same path. To achieve this, I have dedicated myself as an instructor at the [XXX], an organization that collaborates with the Ministry of Education and Culture to train high-school students to represent [country] for the International Biology Olympiad (IBO). Having been involved since my junior year, working in TOBI improved my time management skills which in turn helped me to overcome my poor grades at the end of my sophomore year. In my ten years of tenure, I have risen through the ranks to finally be appointed as one of the jury members from the [country] delegation for IBO 2018 in Tehran, Iran. My proudest moment was when my proposed problem was selected by the organizing committee as part of the theoretical exam, which was taken by 261 students from 68 countries. I enjoy sharing the excitement of biology with my students as well as helping them achieve their own academic success. Many of whom are already on the trajectory of becoming scientists themselves, both in [country] and abroad. Obtaining a Ph.D. will allow me to work in academia, teaching and inspiring more students, and eventually advance biological research in [country].
The Microbiology Graduate Program at [campus] is my top choice for doctoral studies. I found its interdepartmental approach very exciting as to give students a wide-range of research topics to choose from, all under one program. Having had stints in applied microbiology, bioreactor operations, and techno-economic analysis of biotechnology products, I am now keen to pursue the heart of synthetic biology itself: genetic redesign and manipulation of living systems. Primarily, I am interested in metabolic engineering of microorganisms to produce valuable products from sustainable feedstocks. I wish to pursue my work at [XXX] lab in engineering isoprenoid and fatty acid metabolisms in E. coli and yeast to produce biofuels. This would be of strong relevance to [XXX] as my country has been overly reliant on fossil fuels that every rise in gasoline price often leads to public uproar. I am also excited by the work of Dr. [XXX] on engineering pathways to convert plant biomass to biopolymers and Dr. [XXX] in natural product biosynthesis. I hope to be trained rigorously not only in microbiology, genetic engineering, and fermentation techniques, but also computational systems biology and high-throughput analytical methods. I am also ready to start widening my interests to different topics such as programmable genetic control systems. Specifically, I am interested in Dr. [XXX] work in redirecting carbon flux to improve pathway efficiency, Dr. [XXX] work in tunable RNA devices, and Dr. [XXX]'s work in protein engineering. Their expertise will provide me a strong background and mastery of tools to "play God" on microorganisms.
I was so fortunate having the opportunity to visit [campus] in spring 2016 to attend [XXX] and got the chance to interact with [XXX] himself. The strong affiliation of many Graduate Group in Microbiology faculty with the [XXX] and [campus] previous partnership in the [XXX] further convinced me that the school is the premier destination to pursue my interest in sustainability applications of biotechnology. Adding these to the warm weather, vibrant location close to a global city, and being one of the biggest biotech hub in the world, assured me more that I would feel at home in [XXX] and have all resources I need to grow and succeed to be a microbial engineer. After graduation, I plan to pursue postdoctoral studies in industry, and then go back to [country] to develop a bio-based economy through synthetic biology research and train a new generation of synthetic biologists.
I am confident I have the tools and the determination to excel in such a stimulating and challenging environment like [campus]. Through my diverse experiences I have grown into a versatile and adaptable learner, while retaining an intellectual humility to learn new knowledge. My extensive teaching experience would also supplement my PhD journey. I truly hope that [campus] will give me the opportunity to join the Microbiology Graduate Program.
I would appreciate some help to criticize my SoP. I am confused as how to contain all of these points completely within the 1000 word limit while still conveying a focused, sustained, and convincing narrative. Which one I should cut down and which one needs to be fleshed out more. Also with transitions, style, flow, and phrasing/word choices, given I am not a native speaker. This is my top choice so I want them to know every single reason of why I dream to join the program. Some experience points I have omitted will be put on my CV. I attach here the guidelines from my target school as a reference.
Any help would be very much appreciated! Thank you in advance.
Part 1: Introduce yourself, your interests and motivations
Part 2: Summarize your undergraduate and previous graduate career
Part 3: Discuss the relevance of your recent and current activities
Part 4: Elaborate on your academic interests
"Did he just play God?"
"Please describe your aptitude and motivation for graduate study in your area of specialization, including your preparation for this field of study, your academic plans or research interests, and your future career goals. Please be specific about why [campus] would be a good intellectual fit for you."
"Did he just play God?". That was my first thought when in May 2010 I learned that a team led by J. Craig Venter successfully created the first synthetic genomes that worked in a living organism: JCVI-syn 1.0. Although I understood this was not literally the case - as only the transplanted DNA were synthesized in vitro while the cellular machineries were already pre-existed - I was still enthralled since this seminal breakthrough not only it broke the boundaries on the definition of life as we know it, but more importantly, what we can potentially do with it. I saw the opportunity of plugging genes from different species into the minimal genome as a chassis; raising the prospect of building a "super-cell" with a pre-designed blueprint capable to do any programmed task, from producing useful chemicals to detecting toxic substances in the environment.
Around the same time, I received a copy of Nature Biotechnology, December 2009 issue which introduced me to the term "synthetic biology" and concepts such as metabolic engineering, standardization of genetic parts, and tunable genetic circuits. Upon further exploration, I learned on the success of Dr. Jay Keasling in synthesizing the precursor of antimalarial drug artemisinin in yeast. This allowed for a cost-effective production and more widespread use of the drug; potentially saving millions of lives. This profound achievement convinced me on the tremendous potential of synthetic biology to revolutionize the future. From that moment, I decided my career goal is to be a proficient synthetic biologist. And to obtain the necessary skills, I need to pursue a PhD.
I have been long fascinated on potential utilization of microbes for sustainability applications. For this reason, I did my undergraduate thesis at [XXX] studying oyster mushroom growth under five different magnetic field doses under the supervision of Dr. [supervisor 1]. Despite the slow start - due to the relatively lengthy time required to cultivate mushroom bodies for the experiments and frequent contaminations occurring which means repeating the entire procedure - I kept pushing forward by being more careful and learn from every mistake along the way. My data indicated that magnetic field of 0.8 mT increases fruiting body production by 17%, whereas 1.6 mT and 2.0 mT delay the mushroom harvest by 18 days. These results shed more light on fungal physiology and could be applied to improve mushroom production. From this first exposure, I learned that research can be frustrating, but the key to success is perseverance.
Eager to gain more research experience and be more competitive for PhD application, I enrolled in the [XXX] at [XXX]. My research project is on the development of Microbial Electrochemical Cells (MXC) for H2O2 production from organic waste, supervised by [supervisor 2]. Having had no experimental logistics ready as the project was just being commenced; I got the ball rolling by purchasing a simple H-type cell and along with [XXX], a PhD student in the lab, initiated a series of preliminary runs to familiarize ourselves with the setup. However, leafing through the literature, we realized there were not any standardized methodologies to MXC optimization. Unsure of where to start, I brought this to Dr. [supervisor 2] and he kindly advised me: "Just keep working in the lab and start failing". Indeed, this was exactly what happened. We had a dozen of failed iterations of MXC design before finally settled with two which permitted us an ease in operation, sampling, and data gathering. Inspired by a recent paper, we separated the optimization of each MXC chambers. During the cathodic optimization, we obtained the H2O2 yield of ~60 mg/L and current generation of ~8.0 mA using a RVC 80 cathode at poised potential of -0.5 V and high aeration after 3 h. Continuous MXC run using a mixed inoculum generated current after 18 days of operation, peaked at 3.5 mA (1.59 A/m2) at day 24. The pride is not only in seeing my contribution being recognized in a peer-reviewed publication, [journal name], but more importantly in learning that in research we must embrace uncertainty. There are many possible ways to approach a problem, but without trying, we will never know which one would work. We will never reach the goal.
In summer 2015, I pursued an internship project at [XXX], [XXX] under the [XXX] Certificate, as one of the first two [XXX] students selected for the program. My project is on techno-economic analysis of 1,4-butanediol (BDO) production from sugarcane molasses, supervised by [supervisor 3]. By adapting a design based on patents owned by [XXX] on BDO production methods using an engineered E. coli strain, I demonstrated that building a molasses-to-BDO plant in South Africa could generate ZAR 2 billion over 10 years, with ROI of ~720% and payback period of only 1.5 months. For much of the beginnings, I felt truly challenged due to being a student with no prior background on the topic, yet now having to finish in three months what a team of chemical engineering majors typically assigned for a semester. However, Dr. [supervisor 3] kept encouraging me that I more to learn rather than to get the right results. Reinvigorated by this support, I renewed my efforts thus completing the project on time; presenting my results as a technical report and two presentations to the research group. From these, I acknowledged that learning is a tiring endeavor, but the valuable knowledge to be obtained is always worth the pain. Hence, I have to always confident in myself, not be dispirited by any obstacles, and be willing to communicate in asking for help.
My achievements in Biology Olympiad competitions during high school have opened up possibilities I had never imagined before, and therefore, I would like to empower others who wish to pursue the same path. To achieve this, I have dedicated myself as an instructor at the [XXX], an organization that collaborates with the Ministry of Education and Culture to train high-school students to represent [country] for the International Biology Olympiad (IBO). Having been involved since my junior year, working in TOBI improved my time management skills which in turn helped me to overcome my poor grades at the end of my sophomore year. In my ten years of tenure, I have risen through the ranks to finally be appointed as one of the jury members from the [country] delegation for IBO 2018 in Tehran, Iran. My proudest moment was when my proposed problem was selected by the organizing committee as part of the theoretical exam, which was taken by 261 students from 68 countries. I enjoy sharing the excitement of biology with my students as well as helping them achieve their own academic success. Many of whom are already on the trajectory of becoming scientists themselves, both in [country] and abroad. Obtaining a Ph.D. will allow me to work in academia, teaching and inspiring more students, and eventually advance biological research in [country].
The Microbiology Graduate Program at [campus] is my top choice for doctoral studies. I found its interdepartmental approach very exciting as to give students a wide-range of research topics to choose from, all under one program. Having had stints in applied microbiology, bioreactor operations, and techno-economic analysis of biotechnology products, I am now keen to pursue the heart of synthetic biology itself: genetic redesign and manipulation of living systems. Primarily, I am interested in metabolic engineering of microorganisms to produce valuable products from sustainable feedstocks. I wish to pursue my work at [XXX] lab in engineering isoprenoid and fatty acid metabolisms in E. coli and yeast to produce biofuels. This would be of strong relevance to [XXX] as my country has been overly reliant on fossil fuels that every rise in gasoline price often leads to public uproar. I am also excited by the work of Dr. [XXX] on engineering pathways to convert plant biomass to biopolymers and Dr. [XXX] in natural product biosynthesis. I hope to be trained rigorously not only in microbiology, genetic engineering, and fermentation techniques, but also computational systems biology and high-throughput analytical methods. I am also ready to start widening my interests to different topics such as programmable genetic control systems. Specifically, I am interested in Dr. [XXX] work in redirecting carbon flux to improve pathway efficiency, Dr. [XXX] work in tunable RNA devices, and Dr. [XXX]'s work in protein engineering. Their expertise will provide me a strong background and mastery of tools to "play God" on microorganisms.
I was so fortunate having the opportunity to visit [campus] in spring 2016 to attend [XXX] and got the chance to interact with [XXX] himself. The strong affiliation of many Graduate Group in Microbiology faculty with the [XXX] and [campus] previous partnership in the [XXX] further convinced me that the school is the premier destination to pursue my interest in sustainability applications of biotechnology. Adding these to the warm weather, vibrant location close to a global city, and being one of the biggest biotech hub in the world, assured me more that I would feel at home in [XXX] and have all resources I need to grow and succeed to be a microbial engineer. After graduation, I plan to pursue postdoctoral studies in industry, and then go back to [country] to develop a bio-based economy through synthetic biology research and train a new generation of synthetic biologists.
I am confident I have the tools and the determination to excel in such a stimulating and challenging environment like [campus]. Through my diverse experiences I have grown into a versatile and adaptable learner, while retaining an intellectual humility to learn new knowledge. My extensive teaching experience would also supplement my PhD journey. I truly hope that [campus] will give me the opportunity to join the Microbiology Graduate Program.
