I blanked out any mention of teachers, and the school for privacy. The school I want to attend stated this on their admission website, this will give you an idea on what they were looking for.
A letter of intent:
I can vividly remember the speech therapy I received as a child. I remember my difficulty in pronouncing sounds like s, th, and z. the therapy sessions involving games focused on pronouncing difficult the sounds, oral reading activities, as well as the prizes I had received in the end. Speech therapy is a memory of mine that I remember most fondly, and this memory is the reason why I want to be a speech-language pathologist. My own experience with speech therapy as a child showed me the field has the ability to radically change lives. The opportunity to return the favor to children of future generations is my goal.
I am attracted to ___ graduate program in Speech-Language Pathology due to the large variety of research interests in language and literacy offered at the school. Based on ____ state-of-the art facilities, the strength of the speech language program and the research possibilities, I can expect to receive the tools to achieve my goal of becoming an effective clinician in a school system. Some of the current faculty I look forward to learning from would include Dr. ___ and Dr.____, due to the interest I have in their areas of study, child language and literacy. Throughout my undergraduate studies I have heard positive reviews about the program. I always knew I wanted to attend ___ for graduate school.
I believe I will be successful in the graduate program due to my performance in my undergraduate studies. In the past, I observed a speech language pathologist who worked in a rehabilitation facility. I felt it was necessary to first gain knowledge of the field by observation and then gain hands-on-experience. I also volunteered with preschool children. I can remember on my first day, I was more scared of the preschoolers than they were of me! The time spent at these places was a learning experience that I can carry throughout my career. I am currently in the Honors in the Major program at ___, developing my own research project with assistance of Dr.___ and Dr.___, working on a Systematic Review and Meta Analysis on how language disorders is defined and diagnosed. In the past I have assisted PHD students in both the Communication Science and Disorder and Exceptional Education department and , including Dr.___. This experience along with my undergraduate courses in Language Science and Language Development has taught me why research is essential to the field, and piqued my interest in child language. Having these credentials and completing my undergraduate studies a year early demonstrate that I am a hardworking student who will be successful in your program.
___'s graduate degree program in Speech-Language Pathology is an amazing academic program which I expect will present exciting opportunities and will allow me to reach my academic and career goals. I am a confident student. I will bring my strengths and enthusiasm to ___ and the ___ community. I can represent ___ with pride. I appreciate the considerations on my application, and I look forward to the challenges which lay ahead.
San Francisco! That should be fun. Nice, consistent weather year round... I am currently "at" APU studying TESL, so we've got a bit in common. I'm just wrapping up a language acquisition class, so feel free to weigh in on my position statement I've posted here.
You might want to put "/" around your phonemes, just to walk the talk.
Watch your capitalization. "The therapy sessions involving games focused on pronouncing difficult
the sounds, oral reading activities, as well as the prizes I had received in the end." Sessions focused on prizes?
Try omitting some of the "memory" and "remember" as it seems too distant and squishy.
Children of future generations sounds redundant. I think a lot of your first paragraph can be omitted and shorted up for impact. You don't want to bore the board, but tug at their hearts (a little bit!!!) and pique their interest in your interests!
Indent paragraphs, just in case you didn't.
Maybe state your intent to be a school clinician earlier. You also need to show that you actually know what the Doctors have been doing and what you think about the research AND how you might be an asset to that research. I hope you have read their articles.
"...and Exceptional Education department and , including Dr.___..." Don't know what happened here.
Say "I will..." and be certain about your claims. Also, don't forget to tell them HOW you are valuable TO THEM. Or be incredibly flattering while alluding to how you benefit from their program. It's crazy, but we're expected to convince these gluttonous schools to take our money or put us in debt.