Writing Feedback / International tourism: 'foreigners should study local cultures before traveling' [6]

Please help to review my essay below. Thank you so much...

Nowadays, international tourism is the biggest industry in the world. Unfortunately, international tourism creates tension rather than understanding between people from different cultures.
To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

It has been known for some time that the international tourism industry is playing more and more important role in every single country's as well as the world's economy. Some people argue that it brings more troubles than helps such as tension rather than understanding between tourists and local people. In my point of view, I tend to disagree with this opinion.

On one hand, international tourism is undoubtedly good. First of all, it helps people to relax and get away from their world of work. By seeing natural landscape beauties, lying on beautiful sunny beaches or taking part in exciting wilderness adventures in remote countries, people can easily recharge and go back to their daily life with full of energy. Another second point is that while heavy industries are contributing majority of many countries' GDP, tourism is doing no less. However, tourism is totally a green industry with minimum initial investment and doing almost no harm to environment. Therefore, promoting international tourism is not only important but vital mission of every government.

On the other hand, being a tourist in foreign countries may bring with it problems that can lead to dislike of local people. There are plenty of reasons for this such as misunderstandings between locals and foreigners due to language barrier, tourist are often hassled to buy goods or being cheated. Yet, these situations can be improved with interventions and better management of local authorities. In contrast, native people may also end up disliking foreigners. Visitors may mistakenly act contrary or show their disrespectful behaviors to local norms. However, by reading and studying about the local cultures and customs of a country or city before coming, these unexpected tourists' behaviors can be eliminated without any difficulty.

In conclusion, my view is governments should do every effort to promote international tourism, have more practical interventions to keep security for tourist areas, and foreigners should actively study local cultures before traveling. By doing so, there will be no tensions but delight and benefits for both tourists and locals.

Writing Feedback / Natural energy sources are limited, and cannot be replenished - alternative sources are important [2]

I am practicing to write IELTS essay. Please help me to correct my below essay. Thank you very much for your helps.

Government should make more effort to promote alternative sources of energy. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

Answer:

It has been known for some time that the move towards alternative sources of energy is urgently required to stop effects of global warming, polluting environment and exhausting our natural resources. In my opinion, government should have more practical actions to promote the use of other types of energy such as solar, nuclear and wind.

To begin with, there is an alarming issue that governments, at present, are too reliant on gas, oil, coal. The burning of these carbon-based fuels is causing high-scale greenhouse gas emission which, in fact, is the main reason of global warming effects. In addition, accidents in efforts of transporting these sources may lead to serious pollution to environment. For instance, Oil spill has caused thousands of death in marine fauna, upsetting the marine food change. While sun or wind is clean and everlasting source of energy and it does not pollute the environment. Nuclear power is also clean, although it is not totally unproblematic, it would provide a large amount of energy and considerably improve the environment.

It is worth pointing out that natural energy sources are limited, and cannot be replenished. We cannot exploit them forever. Although they are sold at affordable price at presents, there is consistent climb. It is widely known that extensive economy crises happening in the world now, more or less, is stemming from fluctuation in price of oil. How would Eastern European countries be if Russia stopped supplying natural gas? How would the world economy be if the price of oil keep increasing? Therefore, escaping from dependency on fossil source of energy is not only important, but vital mission for every government.

In conclusion, I believe governments should make every effort to promote alternative sources of energy. And investing more on infrastructure, such as fields of wind turbines or solar panels to exploit energy from wind and sun or building nuclear power plant, is one of the possible solutions.

Writing Feedback / A woman's place should be in home? [8]

I am practicing writing skills to prepare for my coming IELTS exam next month. Please help to give comments on my essay. Thank you very much for your supports.

" Some people believe in the traditional idea that the woman's place is in the home, while others say that idea is outdated that women should play an increasingly important role in the workplace of the future. What is your opinion?"

It is quite common these days for women in some countries to stay home after getting married. This trend is not only restricted to the rich family where the women do not need to work cause they already have too much money to cover for their family everyday needs, but is also among the middle class families where the husbands take the major roles of getting money for their families.

The reasons for this trend may involve the recognition that there are so many things for women to do after they get married, particularly for those who decide to have babies, e.g. raising children, taking care of her family and keeping house all is very tired and time consuming. Therefore, if the women can stay home, it will be easier for them and even for their husbands cause they can concentrate completely on their job and their career, which is very important for every men, without worrying about who will cook for his children today, who will take care of them, who will do the housework, etc. The roles of the women will even be more evident when their husbands working as contractors who always have to travel a lot to get jobs.

There are, however, certainly dangers of women only staying home. Women may find it boring and tired with every day tasks, but they have no other choices and cannot adapt to the situation. If this lasts long, it will be very dangerous for them because it can lead them to affection of depressed. The things are worse in some very rich families where women do not need to do anything at all, even at home. They may have the immoderate of spending money or having an adulterous relationship with somebody. But overall, I think it will be less likely, if the husbands respect their wives' decisions whether staying home or getting a job.

My position is men should encourage their wives to stay home if their children are small and need a lot of cares and they can take care of getting money duty for the family. And men should respect their wives' decisions whether to work or not.