Writing Feedback / IELTS Academic Negative Development Essay - Cosmetic Surgery [7]

More people are interested in cosmetic surgery in order to improve their appearance. Why? Is it a positive or negative development?

why cosmetic surgery is so popular nowadays?

My reply (295 words):

Plastic surgery has become more popular in the eyes of those who seek to alter their features for the better. This might be true as the trend of these days follows what is more visually appealing. Nonetheless, I do not this trend positive in any way.

With the increased demand for physical perfection and symmetry, people are bound to experiment with unnatural methods to reach their goals. This demand stems from false advertisements that promote beauty standards only a photo-shopping software can create. Young women are usually the most likely to fall for these traps.

Plastic surgeries may appear to be the only solution for increased self-esteem. It is not uncommon to find people, especially adolescents, being bullied for their imperfect exterior looks. While the better option is to attempt visiting specialised psychologists for help, people end up choosing the shortcut, permanently changing their looks. Not only do they comply to their bullies' wishes but they are not certain themselves if such an intervention will boost their self-esteem.

In my opinion, I believe this is a negative trend. People are now never satisfied with their natural beauty regardless. They see those that claim to look natural, on their television screens, and they want to look like them. They have lost their desire to improve upon their state of mind and just want to look more attractive.

To conclude, cosmetic procedures have been proven to be helpful for those who have been deformed from natural or unnatural reasons, such as 1st degree burns. Nevertheless, the pace at which such operations have boomed, to end up being the answer for feeling better about one's appearance, is a disadvantageous development. There needs to be awareness programs to teach the masses, more importantly young girls, that true beauty comes from within and not with a perfect nose bridge.

-what score would I get? and is 294 words too much even though I managed to do so under the timed conditions. Thanks in advance!

Writing Feedback / IELTS Academic Discussion Essay - Spending money on improving existing public trasport [3]

IELTS book 12 test 7 writing task 2: In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport.

public transportation upgrade

My reply (252 words):

It is considered, by a few around the world, that the construction of new faster trains is where most of the government's funds should be spent. Albeit it might be a good investment, I believe updating the currently available public transportation methods is of higher significance.

Less time spent on commuting between places is usually desirable. In other words, everyone wants to reach their intended destinations quicker. For instance, a man who works in two different districts would see greater value in spending millions on a new faster subway. However, this will lead to an increased number of transportation methods, and the new subway might face a set of complains and thus require later improvement.

On another note, funding projects targeted towards enhancing the existing modes of public transportation is the better option. Some individuals find that building faster means of transport is not the answer for smoother translocation between areas. If there is only one bus that goes from city A to city B, the public would benefit more if the state was to spend on adding another bus. It would definitely be less costly and much more helpful.

In conclusion, a country's cash reserve should be spent very wisely with respect to transportation. Billions of dollars used up on a project such as new and high-speed trains might not be what the citizens want. On the other hand, governmental expenditures on fixing the already present forms of public transport is not only a cheaper option but most probably exactly what the people need.

-please grade my work. This time I tried using a specific structure based on several helpful websites. thanks in advance!